[This is something she has been curious since...forever. It has never made sense to her and the journals are the perfect platform for her to ask questions without receiving odd looks. And it's easier to ask with only Kyouya and Renge present from her world.]

What do you think about your gender? Is it important? If so, why?

[She'll be waiting. Over here. Ignoring gender boundaries like a boss.]

I didn't think I would miss being on a ship so much. But I kind of got used to it. [Particularly at night. The rocking on the boat was actually soothing.] It'll be strange to start all over again, but I wasn't here when Tamaki-Senpai and Kyouya-Senpai formed the last crew.

[Wait.]

Does that make me the new Tamaki-Senpai? [Evil thought begone! And that is semi-legible.]

No one can replace any of them. [Still…] I'm glad we're moving forward. There are plenty of places we can go… [As distractions and for bragging rights should the others show back up again.]

Does anyone know if there are any storms right now? [Because she wants to steer clear of those, kthnx.]

[there is absolutely no warning before a high-pitched, distressed, loud voice emerges from the journal.]

WHO. DID. THIS.

[well, she figured out the voice function... there is an aggressive sigh, then a groan that is dragged out as long as her lungs and throat permit.]

This is NOT Fiji! This is not Monaco, or Bermuda, or Dubai, or even TOKYO! I know well enough that WHATEVER THIS IS ISN'T HOME OR A VACATION SPOT AND WHOEVER BROUGHT ME HERE WITHOUT MY PERMISSION WILL BE SENT ON A HOUSHAKUJI SHIP TO ANTARCTICA AND LEFT TO DEFEND THEMSELVES FROM THE SUN ENTERING THROUGH THE ENORMOUS HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER AND RABID PENGUINS!!!!!!

[there's another groan, and you can practically hear her pulling out her hair. yelling isn't going to help her-- screaming into a book isn't the same as tearing into a real person.]

Though, whoever helps me get home will be handsomely rewarded with as much money as they can carry to wherever they want. And I'll be grateful too! Don't think that I'm some unappreciative wretch. The sooner I get back to my room in Japan, the sooner everyone will be happy. I don't like that I've been KIDNAPPED! It's all fine and well in fiction but HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO ME?!?! I'm ready to leave, no doubt about it! I saw a guy stab another guy. The first guy peed on him, so I mean it was a little deserved but I SHOULDN'T SEE ANYONE GET STABBED OR PEED ON OR SPIT LIKE FIFTEEN FEET!!! DOES NO ONE HERE KNOW MANNERS?!?!?!

[there's a soft sob, followed by squelch (possibly underfoot), then a shriek and rapid-fire swearing in japanese.]

Oh. My god. I do not know what I stepped in, but it was something AWFUL!!!! MY SHOE IS RUINED... This is terrible! Is this the commoner life? I can't handle this. Who has a private jet I can borrow? It's Renge Houshakuji. My family will pay yours back double, I promise!

Antoine... Antoine? No, please - [Haruhi's journal is currently in the jaws of a happy dog. Clearly this is a game. The telling pants of the silly dog can be heard by all. Occasionally there is even a playful growl.]

I don't want to buy another one. What would you use it for anyway? You're a dog.

[Yes, using logic on a dog always works. Antoine is now hopping out of reach and hunkering down, eyes shining brightly.]

I have a treat?

[Well that's a better plan. Except, like his previous owner, the idea of Haruhi giving him a gift thrills him to no end. The dog is soon airborne as he launches himself at her. There is only a short, sharp gasp and then a splash.

Someone got knocked off the dock.

The sound of happy barking ends the feed.]

( Cut for narration )

I regret to inform everyone that the Royal Host Club is currently closed. There are currently no plans to reopen.

[His voice never falters. It remains calm and professional.]

For those who do not know me, my name is Kyouya Otori. I and [he pauses, considers, and chooses his words] a friend, Haruhi Fujioka, need to join a crew.

We also bring a golden retriever.

Neither of us are combatants, and we would prefer to avoid conflict with the Navy as much as possible.

Haruhi is a capable cook, and I am a competent one. I am also extremely qualified to manage expenses and budgets. I also have decent medical knowledge.

Thank you.

[ Sup pirates. Bolin's coming in with a purpose and some genuine enthusiasm for you. ]

Soooo, hey everyone! There are a lot of people with these journals, so I'm guessing... probably a great chance that you have no idea who I am. That's cool. Yeah, no, hey. Again. I'm Bolin.

Just got a couple of things I've been meaning to ask about, since, you know, before whenever it was that things... started getting crazy. Still, uh. Still not exactly sure when that started, but it's been surprisingly easy to forget about stuff since then. Anyway, this is all pretty sports-related? I mean, if you wanna talk about the weather or something, I'm up for it! Kind of not what's on my mind today is all.

Alright, first things first, who here can tell me more about boxing, and is anyone up for showing a guy the ropes sometime? The guy is me, for the record. Don't worry about messing up my good looks, either. They'll be fine.

And way more importantly [ !!! ], do we have like a headcount on people who can manipulate water, earth, or fire? Oh, or airbenders! I mean, there aren't exactly rules standing for air yet, but we could figure that out, I guess. The idea is to get together a few folks to train for a little sport called pro-bending. No big deal, no big deal, just a super-great, fast-paced, really amazing sport from home that would be a lot of fun, is all. Think about it! Let me know.

[ Have a four-second pause while he thinks and makes absolutely sure he didn't forget anything.

Yeah looks like he's good. ]

Great, thanks!

Really? Really? We're all just gonna' jump right into the abyss, huh? Why not? I hope everyone gets as spun up as possible and this turns into an even bigger fiasco. Let's go all out. Why not sink a few Navy vessels while you're at it? Make some more fireworks, so they know where to find you.

Let's face it, life here isn't complicated enough, yet. What we need is more random acts of destruction. I'm quite sure that'll make everyone's lives so much better, and won't bite people in the ass in any way.

[Akira actually has to take a minute to suppress his temper, centering himself as best he can.]

Maybe I'm over-reacting. Who knows, could be stress. Perhaps the air on these islands is just too thin. Still, I've never been more glad to not be on the ocean, than right now. Damn it, I'm so frazzled by all this, I think I'm shedding...

Oh! Luffy, if you're hearin' this, we'll have a guest for a little while. I'll take responsibility for her, so you guys have fun with whatever.

I think...

The mist made me drunk.

[Which is just downright weird, isn't it?]

I don't think it was enough to give me a hang-over, but I remember thinking jumping overboard was a good idea.

[Her voice is monotone. What else do you expect from Haruhi?]

Are sharks prevalent? Has anyone been eaten by a shark? I'm sorry if that brings up bad memories for you.

Since yesterday was Mother's Day, I've been wondering how many of you are mothers? All family is important. At least, I think so. But mothers...

[Considering she has lost her mother, Haruhi feels a lot of things about the day.]

It's special, isn't it? Not that being a father is easy. [She knows that from watching her Dad struggle all of these years.] But it's not Father's Day.

So...

Tell me about your mothers. And if you are a mother, I hope you're close to your children. Nothing can replace that bond.

[Uh oh, getting too serious again.]

Anyway, I know it's a little late, but let's celebrate.

I want to apologize for my behavior at the beginning of the month. I was...well. It doesn't matter. [No, she doesn't want to go into details.] I can see I wasn't the only one.

That doesn't make me feel much better.

Anyway, I'm...normal again, so where can I help? [Being useful will make her feel better. Maybe? SHE DOESN'T KNOW ANYMORE.] Is everyone alright?

[Private to Tamaki.]

I can't catch your dog. [Meaning she can't get her clothes back.] It might be a lost cause, but it would be nice if I could put my clothes where they belong.

[i.e. in her closet or on her back.]

And...as for...some of things I said...

Forget it. Forget all of it.

[/]

[There is a sound coming over the journals now that few have ever heard and few here may ever hear again: Itachi is laughing.

He sits, balanced comfortably on the top of the mast, one arm wrapped around it while he holds the journal in the other. His legs dangle, kicking childishly.]

It's beautiful out today. Don't you think so?

[The cheerfulness in his voice may sound utterly unnatural to anyone who's gotten to know him.]

I'm feeling positively energetic. Hell, I want to fight someone. Anyone up for it? I'll hop over to your ship. I'll fight a whole ship. Challenge me.

What a lovely day! [There are drawings by that statement. A happy sun. Flowers. Yes. Drink it in.] This is the perfect day for a sundress, don't you think? I would really like to have one of my own.

[Says the girl who has been pretending to be a boy for all of the Host Club activities. Whoops.]

And make-up! I never get a chance to really dress up. All of my clothes are just so…masculine.

[All of this is wrapped up with a drawn sad face.]

[OOC: Forward dated to April 1st because my schedule is iffy and I have time to post now? If I need to wait, let me know?]

Dear...bugger it, not in the mood—

Potter seems to have pissed off back to our world, which is just typical. Always has to have things just handed to him because he's the bloody Boy Who Lived. I bet Dumbledore gave him the House Cup the second he walked into the Great Hall, too, just because he finally bothered to show up for classes halfway through the year. Probably gift-wrapped it, at that.

1000 points to the arseholes of Gryffindor because Potter's not stuck in some stupid bleeding pirate world anymore.

- Draco Malfoy

P.S. Help, my ship has been taken over by ninjas and one of them is wearing the most ghastly and horrid shade of orange and another has pink hair that I think actually might not be dyed or charmed. Why do I have to still be stuck with these nutters when Potter isn't????

[Long time no see, journal. Haruhi sounds hoarse as she addresses whoever might be listening.]

It's so warm but I can't feel it. I stood in the sunshine for two hours. All it did was make me feel worse.

[She muffles a cough against her hand.]

I wonder if I have a Cold? Great time for one. My body is usually stronger than this.

[Not that she has spent much time on the sea. Ever.]

Don't worry, I'll wear a mask when I'm cooking. And I'll wash my hands. A lot. How contagious are Colds anyway?

Very, right?

Huh.

[Why worry?]

More Vitamin C for me.

Why, exactly, should I waste my time running around in search of an imaginary, wish-granting gem?

[The disgruntled voice you're hearing belongs to Mitsunari Ishida. As haranguing townsfolk has ultimately gotten him nowhere, he's finally taken a look at the apparently magic journal he woke up with. The accompanying note from "Scurvey Dog" has cleared up a couple of things, but the answers aren't quite what he wanted to hear.]

I detest pirates, I detest this absurd place, and all I "wish" for is to know one thing: where I will find the man known as Ieyasu Tokugawa.

For the sake of Lord Hideyoshi, inform me of his whereabouts at once!

[Clearly someone isn't in the mood for smalltalk. There's no "thank you for your time" after this message or anything. That's that.]

I haven't used this thing in awhile. Um... [There is some shuffling around as she makes herself comfortable.] I've been thinking...

Does anyone teach Martial Arts? Or defensive techniques? I meant to learn back home, but I ran out of time.

[She falls quiet, considering her next words.]

I think I'm in shape. For the most part. But I'm not sure what I could pay you with. Maybe favors?

I can cook and bake.