piratejournal | [Voice]

Hi! [He knows this voice, but can't for the life of him remember his name.]

Wait they do it with light?

[Excitement is only building. It sounds so freakin' cool!]

Do you think people could do that?!

I dunno, man, maybe... it probably wouldn't work, though, we look at people straight on, so I think light bends in different directions. People have to use different ways to make themselves seems something different than what they look like.

People can definitely be invisible until they bite you. They just do it by making themselves look harmless, y'know?

[In that regard, Roxas does alright. He seems perfectly sweet and innocent until his temper flares or you become his enemy, then he is just dangerous.]

I thought it might work. Oh well, I guess I can't be invisible, but those sharks can! I saw baby sharks at the aquarium.

[Again, not sounding very afraid. Lea may be onto something with his concern.]

And you know a shark would eat you just as soon as look at you, right? Meat is meat to a shark. And sharks grow up to be way bigger than you.

[Jesse is getting concerned himself- and that takes a lot.]

Maybe, but we don't really see sharks much and I could hit it with my keyblade!

[Anyone wants to challenge him to a fight, he'll fight.]

The little baby sharks were really cute! Lea said not to pet them though. They had a petting pond with other things um...these flat animals and a little crab Lea was teasing...

Stingrays I bet! That sounds awesome- I pet them once at an aquarium on a school trip, they're super soft and they splash you-

[Stay on target, stay on target...]

Yeah... You might not see sharks a lot, but I bet you don't see, uh. Megalodons much either, and one of them could snort you up in its nose, man. And you'd be gone, no more Roxas.

It was really awesome! It was soft even though it's a little wet, and it did splash me! How did you know?

[It was really fun to go to the aquarium and pet things, plan a heist and go look at all the fish.]

What is that? It sounds huge!

Well, that's what they like to do, stingrays, so I kinda figured...

[He's faltering a little. Lea must have been having a bitch of a time- this is hard.]

Uh- well, it's this giant, old shark- so big it wouldn't even notice you if you fell in the ocean. It'd just snort you up. It wouldn't even be a fight or anything cool like that. That's the thing about the ocean, man, it's so big, there's things in it that make people look like ants. And even if you gave ants like, giant bombs for ants, it wouldn't make any difference against people, right? That's what it's like for these ocean things, like krakens and megalodons. They can't even acknowledge us 'cause it's like we don't exist.

Really? Is there something that big in the ocean? Wouldn't I have seen it?

[Still sounding more in awe than anything.]

Nah, man- the ocean is just that big. It covers the whole planet, except where there are the little islands spotting over it. Think about one person, and then how big a planet is- and then how deep the ocean must go. And how much space that is. And how much stuff can fit in that space. And just how big some of that stuff could get. And we'd never know.

[Jesse is successfully freaking himself out now.]

It's just like space. There's no end to space! Space just keeps going! What's out there? How can it not end? There's got to be an end!

It is?

[He tries to imagine it he really does, but he can't even comprehend that kind of size.]

Keeps going on...forever?

[There's a thought that's strong enough to make his head hurt.]

Forever

[It hurts Jesse's head too.]

It never stops. Any direction. Up, down, left right, it just keeps going. There's no end. Ever. There's planets out there that if they sent some kind of ship today, the sun would have exploded before it ever got to us, because it would take that freaking long. The light that we see now originated on the sun like, millions of years ago, and it just now got here because it's that far away. And that's considered close.

[Roxas whines.]

I don't like that! How do you know when you're at the end? I don't like space!

[Congratulations, he's now afraid of space.]

[At least he's afraid of something!]

You can't know because there isn't any end, man, that's the point! It's forever! It's the song that never ends!

[The reference is lost on him really.]

Lea!

[He calls him and there's footsteps on the deck as he goes to find his best friend to cling to. It takes a couple of minutes.]

I don't like that. I don't want to be in space.

Well, then you should stick in the atmosphere on the planet, shouldn't you?

[It's hard not to sound smug, but he does manage it.]

How do I do that? Tell me!

[Real nice, being smug about scaring a kid. Roxas doesn't want to think about being in a vast, dark, empty space.]

[Hey, sometimes you gotta scare a kid to teach 'em a lesson!]

Well, you just gotta be careful. Don't do anything too crazy. If you don't know exactly what's going on, or where something's gonna take you, you think it through first. You stick with the people you know you can trust to really take care of you- the people who do it because they want to, not because they're gettin' something out of it- and you watch your step. You don't wanna be getting on some boat with people you don't know and then findin' out later that it's goin' to the moon, right?

[That's a lot of advice all at once. He's not the best at any of those things, except the part about sticking with Lea.]

I...I don't know! I just stay with Lea. He found this boat.

Well, does he care about you without wanting anything back? Then stick with him. He'll look out for you.

I don't think he wants anything back. He never said anything about it, he's my best friend.

[He smiles a little.]

I know he'll look out for me, he does it all the time! Ever since I appeared!

If he's your best friend, then you stick with him. Friends look after each other. He won't let you float out into space.

And if he's worried about you, take it seriously, yo. Friends worry for good reasons. And friends should listen to friends.

That's true. If I floated out into space he'd come and get me.

[The fact that would kill him is not even one he knows.]

I listen to him all the time! [He does not.] I don't know why he's worried. He's worried cause I'm broken. Wait, not broken...he said...uh...he said naive. That was it.

[Lea doesn't like it when he says broken.]

[His voice takes on a slight edge.]

Yeah, you're not broken. Naive isn't broken. Just means you don't know all the bad things about the world, that's all. It's not a bad way to be, just means... it's easier to get hurt.

You'd have to know a lot more about those bad things before you got broken.

That's not why I'm broken. It's 'cause I don't do what I'm supposed to. Like Lea said I'm supposed to be scared of the ocean, but I'm not. I don't get scared a lot.

[It's not an emotion he's super familiar with yet.]

A lot of times I don't feel things right, and I don't get things. That's why I'm broken, but Lea doesn't like that. He says I'm not broken, just naive. 'Course I'm not supposed to feel anything at all, so I was weird to begin with.