piratejournal | [Written]

Entry tags:

[Written]

alright so i guess i should get started on this whole shitty pirate adventure
just wandering around aimlessly and writing sweet rhymes is gonna cover my necessary quota of entertaining shit to do
but its not gonna get me back in magic video game land where i kind of need to be right now
anyway time to make myself not sound at all as shitty a guy as i am

name / dave strider
occupation / knight of time
hobbies / no

ok nevermind
look i have time powers a legendary shitty stupid sword and im pretty sick with the beats
i have never sailed on a boat and after this i plan on never doing it again
alright peace

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

you want me to jot verses on the fly
dont think i can impress
any dude lackin taste like captain bly
anythin i write in text
is just gonna be denied
since its not that shitty slam poetry
youll think ive got a disability
look at me like a poet
and youll be real disappointed

Despite the incorrect usage of 'real', you'll have to color me disappointed, as you so put it.

Do you have a crew yet?

i dont
and also i didnt
but hey whatever
so i second your question with a
do you have an identity

That's a good question. You may call me Grell.

wow grell sounds welsh
are you welsh
also are you a monster
important question that always follows
are you welsh

[Yet, he's being 100 percent sarcastic.]

{....is this person on intoxicants?]

I'm a monster that is Welsh. [Will he believe her?]

[No, he's just stupid as hell.]

well shit i wasnt expecting to be right
alright third surprise question
do you plan on eating me

[...well now.]

Who can say. I don't know you well enough to contemplate consuming your body and soul.

should i be shakily rattling off reasons why i should live
because understandably my reasons are pretty flimsy at best
not that id really die but who cares

Flimsy or not, I'd like that list.

[But more importantly...]

You don't think you'd die here? Why is that?

well ill die but it wouldnt really hold in most cases
im like this shitty version of a god
but as for reasons i guess
im a pretty decent guy and the universe is probably at a decent guy shortage

Oh, we already have a deity aboard the ship. It's not as fantastic as it sounds.

No, this universe needs less decent guys. Your argument is now invalid.

You may join my crew, regardless.

i guess being disappointed ahead of time works too
ok but well
i dunno i guess i should ask how serious you guys are
i mean i sound cagey and stupid but i kind of want out of this place for real

We aren't quite that serious about searching for this shard, but if you wish to collect it, we could assist you.

i guess thats cool
so hows your crew shaping up
dealin with the shitty pirate lifestyle so far

We are dealing, yes. It's not too difficult, once one is out at sea long enough.

Having doubts, Mister Strider?

dude you have no idea the shit ive gone through
weird nonsensical bullshit is woven into the goddamn tapestry of my miserable soul

Good, then you're quite ready for us!

constantly ready
always sitting under the bleachers rarin to go to make the game winning play
so which ship is yours

It's called The Golden Rapier. Do let us know when you're coming so we can expect your arrival.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only