piratejournal | [voice, mostly] and always action to Straw Hats

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[voice, mostly] and always action to Straw Hats

Out of curiosity, has anybody figured out a...I don't know, an antidote or something to protect people from losing their damn minds every other month? By now I've seen enough bizarre behavior, it'd be nice to find some kind of immunity to that.

...not that we can predict when it happens.

Which reminds me. Ace, you ever send Luffy something like that again and I'll come over there next. You don't want me to come over there.

[some time later, he adds, scrawled on the bottom of the page as if he forgot that he can't write notes to himself on this journal...]

Needs more treasure. I need those weights.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[SOMETIMES, YES, MAYBE, HE DOESN'T THINK IT WOULD NECESSARILY BE A BAD THING ARGH—]

No. But you could be less of a shitty brick wall.

Why should I? [he never thought of himself as a mystery but if it vexes Sanji, he's certainly not going to stop being stoic]

[Just kinda stares at him for a moment, all grumpy and frowny looking, then he grits his teeth and looks away, scrubbing a hand through his hair.]

I dunno. No reason, I guess.

[Downs the rest of his drink before setting the glass in the sink harder than is probably necessary. He goes over to pull the fridge door open and proceeds to blankly look at what it has to offer.]

What do you want for dinner?

[it's not obvious, but his eye does follow the cook, as he sits there wondering why it's so important for Sanji to be able to read him. This bears much more thinking]

I'm not picky. Whatever you've got.

[sipping so casually at his sake]

Do we need to do more fishing or anything?

[Ignores that question in favor of banging his head against the fridge door.]

Seriously? You give me all this shit about being an idiot for doting on the ladies and giving 'em what they want but you can't even pick a friggin' meal when I do ask you!

[Whips around to glare at him because for some reason this is very irritating, who even knows why, it's been a weird day, okay. Or week. Or couple of months, fucking shit.]

Tell me what the hell you want for dinner, dammit!

[geez, what's with the hostility? Zoro bristles right back at him for interrupting his quiet enjoyment of his booze]

I don't care! You're the cook, make something good!

EVERYTHING I MAKE IS GOOD!

[Pissy McGrouchypants over here suddenly, shoving his hands into his pockets and scowling at Zoro as he throws random dinner suggestions at him like they're attacks.]

Sushi? Barbecue chicken? Steaks?? Spicy seafood pasta?! Tempura??! Name something, asshole!

Of course everything you make is good, that's why I don't care!

[whoops didn't mean to compliment.]

What part of 'I don't have a preference' isn't getting through your damn thick head?

[he's not nearby or anything but he can hear them-- mostly cuz the dinner question perked him up... but he listens to them and smiles to himself as he rests on the prow of the Merrily, his cheek pushed against the wood.

They really get along for them.

It makes him happy]

[Freezes up a little, eyes going wide as his face grows warm. He quickly turns his back on Zoro in an attempt to hide it, peering into the fridge again and forcing himself to refrain from just sticking his entire damn head into the freezer.

After half a beat, he reaches for a large platter of sea beast meat.]

[Dammit. He didn't mean to shut the cook up quite like that. Zoro flops back into his chair and busies himself draining most of the bottle of sake. It'll give him a good appetite, at least.

He's sure he caught Sanji blushing, and the silence is rather telling.]

[Grabs some vegetables, as well, then moves on to the cabinets and pulls out a huge bag of white rice. He situates everything on one of the counters except for the vegetables, which he turn to drop onto the table in front of Zoro instead. A knife follows, and he speaks in a gruff tone.]

Here, shitty broccoli head. Chop the broccoli.

[he looks up at the appearance of the knife]

Huh? Me?

[what is this sorcery. The cook never lets anyone touch his knives, let alone the food. Zoro has never prepared food in his entire life, this is way outside his area of expertise. So, he's going to stare at Sanji instead.]

You see anyone else around here who matches that description?

[Stares right back at him. 8|]

Well? You use the sharp side, come on, I hear you're familiar with the shitty things. And vegetables don't fight back. I think you can manage it.

[He still can't figure out why this is happening, but he'll rise to the challenge. Of course he can use sharp things to cut other things! Broccoli, though...

The knife will be fine, but the food, not so much. He can't figure out exactly how to chop it up in a manner which the cook would consider "proper," so in short order there are hilariously uneven chunks of vegetable scattered all over, big thick pieces of the woody stem and little crumbled bits of the florets. This is an affront to cooking happening right here.]

[.......Holy shit what even. Sanji was going to get started on the rest of the meal, but he gets distracted watching in utter bemusement. He can't even get mad, though, the WTF look on his face just steadily growing as Zoro butchers the broccoli. Another moment more and he snorts out a muffled laugh, his head falling forward.]

Are you really this fucking useless?

What? [super-annoyed by being laughed at] I'm not a cook, what do you want?

Nothing, nothing.

[Waves it off, trying to force his grin away and failing kinda miserably. He moves to get the fish prepared and start on the rice.]

It'll be edible all the same, just don't drop any on the floor.

[pouting considerably more, now. Clearly he did it wrong but he doesn't know how or why, so all he can do is be irritable]

What was the point of that, anyway? Just so you could laugh at me?

[Shrugs, working some fancier knife work as he slices the sea beast.]

Wasn't one. Figured as long as you were sitting there, you could help.

[he watches, knowing full well that the cook is just as skilled with those knives as he is with his blades, but in totally different ways. How dumb. Because he can't admit his fail without losing face in front of Sanji, even moreso than he already has. Dammit.]

Next time I'll take my bottle and go drink somewhere else.

[Gets the fish in the oven in record time, then glances back at Zoro with a grin.]

Yeah, take your bottle, you big baby. Why are you pouting? So it ain't pretty, not like you completely damaged it.

[Grabs some more veggies like carrots and celery and brings them over to the table, sitting across from him and snatching up the knife.]

Dumbass. Watch.

[Proceeds to chop away using precise, quick strokes, though not anywhere near his usual speed, with his hands of course in the proper positions.]

Shut up, damn curly-cook.

[His eye is on those hands, naturally, but it just looks like chopping. If there's technique, he can't see it. Yet somehow Sanji's vegetables all come out in perfect slices, all the same size and looking pretty. Zoro would be jealous if he cared.]

...and?

[Flips the knife around, holding the handle out to him.]

And I wanna see if you can do it.

Why?

[it's an honest question, no accusing tone here.]

You don't need anyone's help in the kitchen.

[voice, mostly] and always action to Straw Hats

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