piratejournal | [Voice]

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All Shepherds, meet on deck for tea time and discussions.

Keimi check in as soon as you can.

And yes, we're getting low on coffee, and cigars. I'll survive, [No, he won't.] but I still refuse to switch to tea.

For all you pirates out there, what did you lot do before you came here? Occupations, careers, whatever. I need to know what freedom you're fighting for, let's just say.

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She said...what exactly? [no seriously. He's confused. Which part of what he said fit into a your mom scenario? Though in terms of those kinds of jokes, for all he knew she did and got paid very well for it, too. He'd be damned proud of her-- if he knew who the hell she was]

[He was referring to cracking her head on a headboard but you know....]

[It really wasn't worth defending.]

Does it matter?

[Exactly.]

It does for the sake of the insult. Listen, rookie, the whole purpose is flow and confidence. If you make an insult you stand behind it a hundred percent so you don't look like a limp noodle if it flops, you catch me?

Now if I, for example, say, your mother is a harbor since she's had so many sailors in her-- good insult, poor delivery, but the point is I say it without backing down from it and then try to figure a way to refine it into a joke that would make Sengoku himself inhale his beard. You follow?

Don't explain your Mom jokes when you can't even grasp that I was saying her conversation wouldn't matter. Her mouth was being put to other uses. Get it yet?

Fuck, I can't believe I let myself stoop this low to a farce of a conversation. I need to find more books to read. Or resign myself to a new hobby.

You're making me miss trading barbs with Crocodile of all people. Can we just concede the last few months here sucked worse than your Mom?

Now that's an insult. She probably sucked pretty damn well thank you very much. And much better than you do. Crocodile should know.

[second lesson, if you misunderstand an insult, never let on and divert your opponent with an even greater insult]

How did you get the sand out of your teeth?

[GAGS.]

[Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.]

You win.

Just shut up. That's revolting. I never want to think of anything in this context ever again. [Excuse him, he needs to go throw up now.]

It was a sour victory because now I think I'm picturing it. Not a pretty sight. It was a game well fought and I look to play again. [he salutes you. mentally anyway]

No. Never again.

I'll stick with dealing with your baby brother. At least he's funnier and less fucked in the head.

Well if you must run with your little tail between your legs, do so. I'll go drown my sorrows with wine and women.

My condolences to both since you'll probably sour both of them.

Oooh. I'm going to need ice for that one. Well played. [he can't help but be amused by Smoker and looks forward to tormenting him in the future]

Don't say things like that stupid. I choke fires, not stoke--

I hate all of you.

[he just laughs and closes the journal. You've brightened his day. Thanks]

Smoker-san...

...

... you got beat very badly, didn't you?

Oi...

First of all, don't listen to that filth.

Secondly, I was just trying to keep him talking so he'd give away something useful.

[WHILE THIS IS TRUE.....]

But you're right. It didn't work.

I don't think I really expected it to. There aren't many in my world who could get away with calling me a rookie, but by his standards, I am still.

Still, it was worth a shot. I think.

Don't tell the others. [Because that was incredibly embarrassing jeez.]

I'm not going to listen to him, Smoker-san, I just...

... is this what battles of wits between men are like?

I don't think you should have said such unpleasant things about each other's mothers, but I suppose this is a game I know anything about.

I won't tell anyone, but... it is kind of there for everyone to see ^^;

No. Were this in person, it would have been a lot more drastic. [SMOKER WOULD STILL PROBABLY LOSE BUT IT WOULD BE BLOODY AND EVEN MORE HIDEOUS.]

I very much doubt if the 4th division commander even knows his mother or cares. Nor do I know my own, which is part of the joke.

For the Whitebeard pirates, it's their adopted father who matters most, and must never be insulted by their honor. Most of their crew were either runaways or orphans, and both the swordsman and I are aware of that, and know that the other is likewise informed.

If I'd been willing to say worse things it could have gotten more unkind, but such things were never my style. My best friends always tried to get me better at being sharp like that, but as I said, I'm nothing like Akainu -- Sakazuki, and I never wish to be.

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