piratejournal | [Locked to Spade Pirates, written]

[Even though he can't see Riku's reaction, he could tell his heart is beating faster, and that alone tells him it was pretty effective.]

Sorry. Thanks for helping me experiment, though.

It's fine. I'm fine.

[Ish.]

Some of it was just...unexpected.

You don't have to worry about it. It wasn't real. Just an illusion. If you need me to take away the fear, I can do that. I'd hoped it would be okay, because you knew I wasn't going to hurt you, but maybe not.

[Better to ask first, as he found out.]

[Oh. Great, now Natsuno was worried he'd been like scarred by the experience or something. ...Writing suddenly seemed pointless when he could just go talk to the guy.]

Where are you?

In the crow's nest, but please don't come and hit me, Selphie already did that, twice.

[...He snorts a little at that, but he's gonna be a jerk and not reply or try to reassure Natsuno that he's not mad. Instead he closes the journal and heads out onto the deck.

A few minutes later, his head pops up over the edge of the crow's nest.]

Why would I hit you?

She said it was because that was not unpleasant but really scary and I should learn the difference.

[Natsuno sighs. He didn't say it was going to be fun and it probably wasn't.]

[Just rolls his eyes, then grunts as he pulls himself up and climbs in, taking a seat across from Natsuno.]

Yeah, well. That's her. You told me it'd be creepy. [Frowns a little and looks away.] Which wasn't exactly right either, but whatever. I could tell that's what you were going for.

[Natsuno blinks at him.]

It wasn't? Huh...

[That's strange. He frowns a bit.]

Well tell me about it. Your heart was pounding.

[His eyes snap back to Natsuno at that, a little wide and startled.]

You could tell? Ah...

[Clears his throat.]

Well, don't get me wrong. Footsteps when you can't see who's coming, stuff falling for no reason...that kind of thing doesn't scare me. Doesn't mean it isn't creepy in its own way, but it's like being in a haunted house.

[He shrugs, then looks down at his hands.]

Not being able to move, though. That's not creepy either, it's... [He lowers his voice some, eyebrows drawing together.] Terrifying.

[Natsuno nods a little, leaning forward.]

I can tell your heartbeat. It's how I found you..and Kairi and Selphie.

[He nods a little bit. Maybe he doesn't really know about creepy. Finally, as he rounds out to it his eyes widen. Oh. That he understands.]

Oh. That's...I understand that. Sorry.

[He nods. Actually, he's not sure how he feels about that. And he's still not entirely sure what caused it. Maybe it had started with the panic at being frozen, but...

He shakes his head a bit.]

It's fine. Just, I've been in that position before. Someone was...controlling me. You didn't know. Anyway, that was the point, right? That was the worst part of the whole thing, but that doesn't mean other people wouldn't be scared by the rest.

I won't do that again.

[Natsuno glances at him. Well if it wasn't that creepy for Riku.]

There's just one more thing I want to try. Can I?

Don't—if you want to practice, it's not a problem. Like I said, the rest of it was fine.

[Looks back up at Natsuno again finally.]

Something different? Sure.

[Natsuno takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. This time he speaks, although he focuses and he's actually speaking Japanese on purpose.]

Riku. Listen to me.

[This time there's no ominous feeling, but there is a vision. Natsuno turns to face him, red eyes, fangs extended. He leaps across the distance, landing in front of him, one knee on either side of his hip as he leans down and makes to bite his neck again, one hand pressing against his chest to keep him from escaping. Riku can move all he likes, but the apparition fades pretty quickly after that.

Natsuno is still sitting there with his eyes closed, although his fangs are extended and he looks a little taxed, sweat sliding down his cheek.]

[The fact that he can still move is appreciated, but as soon as he makes sure that he can it becomes irrelevant anyway. He kind of freezes on his own when Natsuno basically straddles him, and for a second he has no idea what to expect when Natusno leans down.

But, of course, the fangs are out and his eyes are red, so the answer there is kind of obvious even though Riku struggles for a moment to come up with it and make sense of the situation.

His breathing picks up again, not to mention his heartbeat, and by the time the vision fades he's still sitting there drawing in shaky breaths and staring straight ahead blankly.

He blinks after a moment.]

...You make it seem very real.

I could try and come up with a much less creepy scenario...maybe. I kind of have an instinct for it, I think.

[He exhales.]

That's a lot of work though. You okay?

Less creepy?

[He still sounds kind of distracted honestly, but he blinks again and shakes his head a bit. Focus, man.

Right.

That scenario was supposed to freak people out, not—

...

Well.

...Okay, so maybe he's broken or something. But Natsuno doesn't need to know that, so he just nods.]

Yeah. Sure. I'm fine.

I mean for experiment's sake, but all I could think of was something creepy.

[He crosses the distance between them, kneeling in front of him to look into his eyes.]

Your heartbeat was quick again. I thought I was scaring you. Sorry.

[Blinks yet again at Natsuno being right there, and his cheeks flush a little as he leans back an inch or two. His hand comes up to press at his chest, as if he can slow his heartbeat back down again by doing so.]

...You weren't. Doing worry.

[He goes a bit shifty-eyed, a tiny frown on his face.]

That little heartbeat trick of yours is really unfair.

Okay, if you say so.

[Natsuno nods, albeit a bit worried. He tilts his head at Riku's comment.]

Well normally, it's not so bad, just when I have a lot of bloodlust. I've never had this much blood before. I can find humans around me without a problem. It's like a sense. Although, I don't think I can do any more illusions for a little while, they are really tiring.

I can try and tune it out if you want.

[Although it's really beneficial way to keep track of where Riku is. He may have been using it all day.]

[Shakes his head.]

You don't have to do that, I just.

[...Just what, he has no idea what he was going to say there. Really, what does it matter if that's something Natsuno can do? It...shouldn't be a problem. Right?

For whatever reason, his cheeks go a deeper pink. Which is embarrassing. MAYBE NATSUNO WON'T NOTICE.]

Uh. Never mind. You should—I mean, if it's like a sense then don't ignore it. It's fine. I...

[WHAT ARE WORDS. Also, what is wrong with him? And why is Natsuno still right in front of him?]

...Stop giving me that worried look!

[Natsuno can only watch Riku get flustered and worry that he did that to him. He has no idea how he could have done that, except maybe Riku was afraid of his illusions and didn't want to say. He grimaces a little bit, but when Riku takes that accusatory tone, his frown deepens.]

Are you feeling okay?

[He leans forward and places his hand on Riku's forehead to feel his temperature, just in case. Maybe he wasn't feeling well to begin with. He should have said something in that case. He doesn't have a fever, but his heartbeat...]

Look...just take a couple of deep breaths, okay?

[Tenses up and kind of freezes, his eyes going a little wide when Natsuno moves in.]

I told you, I'm fine. Your visions were just. I. They were...unexpected...

[He does what Natsuno says after that, or starts to, but rather than taking a couple deep breaths he takes one and ends up holding it in to shut himself up. Here, Natsuno, have an earnest look while Riku pretends to be okay even though he's not breathing. 8D]

[Riku might say that he's fine, but he doesn't seem fine. He's flustered or upset or something. Now he's stopped breathing. Natsuno is aware now how close he is to Riku and sucks in a breath. Maybe that was the problem. He pulled his hand away from Riku slowly.]

I know it must be hard to forget. What I am, sometimes. Maybe I'm playing human too much. I-I'm sorry.

[He's pretty sure this is the scariest thing he's done, and Kairi, Selphie and now Riku didn't take to it very well. It's a good skill for fighting a battle, but it's also a heavy reminder.

Natsuno puts his hands on the ground, making like he's going to get up and leave Riku to his own devices.]

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