piratejournal | [Written] It's been awhile...

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[Written] It's been awhile...

I've been here awhile. Do you think people at home miss you?

I mean, I wonder if my friends miss me.

~~My dad said that~~

I know I didn't know them very long but I was glad to have them. They were so nice and welcoming. I miss school and having things to study. I miss my friends...even my stupid brother. I guess I'm feeling a little homesick. I mean, it's been awhile since animals have tried to chew on me. Who knew I'd miss that?

This place is really dangerous for someone like me. We had a fight with the Navy and I was completely useless. I was scared then. I've been scared here a lot. What am I supposed to do in a situation like that?

Ah, I'm sorry for disturbing everyone by writing out my thoughts.

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In other words, you're giving up without even giving it a shot? Wow. That's even worse than I expected.

[The way he sees it, the guy on the other end is whining about his own weakness but isn't willing to take a risk to change it. That sort of attitude annoys him, and Ragna will make sure it doesn't go unnoticed.]

Keep sitting on your ass and bitching 'bout how useless you are, then. See where that gets you. Just don't come crying to this book when shit blows up in your face, idiot.

I just...I don't...

[He lets out a small, frustrated noise.]

As much as I'd like to say I was a strong person, all I've ever done is run away. I can't pretend that isn't the case.

Then stop running away now.

You really don't get it, do you? Who gives a damn what you've been doing in the past? You've been a friggin' loser, I get it; so what? You can get your shit together and try to change that. Look for a way to become stronger and if one thing doesn't work out, keep looking until you find it. Or you can sit in the corner whining 'bout how you can't do anything and spend the rest of your life in fear.

Stop giving me crappy excuses why you "can't" this or that. It's all up to you.

[As harsh and irritated Ragna is, a part of him genuinely means well for the guy. Obviously, he can't know the details of Hachiken's situation, but his own childhood experiences with being too weak and too scared to protect what's dear to him are more than enough to form a strict opinion on the subject.

He'd never wish anyone going through something similar to realize it, though.]

[There's a pause as Hachiken tries to think about it. To stop running away would be a big change for him at this point. Some of his words are harsh and true at that.]

I don't know what to do to become stronger. How do I figure that out?

[Part of him thought he was getting stronger, but he learned pretty quickly that that just wasn't the case. Physically, he's not bad actually.]

If there was something I could do, I would devote myself to it. I wasn't a cook before coming here, well, besides pizza. I made that before at school. I'm...not the best though.

[And that bothers him. It bothers him deep down and the fact it bothers him bothers him even more. Like if he isn't the best, it doesn't mean anything.]

[It appears Hachiken actually takes time to consider what he said, which is enough for Ragna to stop being as angry with him as he was just a moment ago. Perhaps the guy isn't entirely without hope.]

Guess the easiest way is to find someone strong who could teach you shit... Someone you could call your Master.

[... And to be fair, that's probably the only piece of advice he can offer at this point.]

Yeah? ... What did you do before coming here, then?

[He's not particularly interested in his life story, but rather wants a confirmation that it's not a lost case he's wasting his time on.]

I suppose that might not be a bad idea.

[If he can find someone to teach him. He's not sure those skills really exist on his crew.

Ragna doesn't need to worry. Hachiken rarely dispenses with much of his life story at all, especially since no one is interested.]

I was a student at an agricultural school. Dairy Sciences.

[Agricultural school.

Somehow, Ragna feels like he really should've started with this question.]

... Are you shitting me.

Uhhh...no?

[He lets out a little nervous laugh.]

I went there for high school. It's interesting...

[And traumatizing and a whole bunch of other things.]

"Interesting".

[Right.]

... Hate to rain on your parade, but that doesn't exactly make you a great pirate material.

[Ragna's never considered himself to be one, either, though in the light of this... he's pretty sure being the most wanted criminal in the world does give him an advantage over a goddamn high schooler.]

I know it doesn't. I don't really have a choice though, it seems.

Good point. Guess that means you're done for.

[Verbal shrug.]

Are you sure...?

[Oh god, he was going to die here, wasn't he? There were things he wanted to do!]

Yep. Was nice knowing you, kid.

[Not that he even knows his name or anything.]

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[Written] It's been awhile...

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