piratejournal

[everyone is safe where they should be and they are on their way to Candy Mountain. Luffy is content and when a strange package from Ace via the Margie woman arrived, he was alone on deck and opened it to see what it was. It looked to be weird bottles with tiny writing that said Dr. Dan's Fizzy SugarJolt and other words that were too small to read but it didn't matter so he drank one

and then fifteen more.

And now he is sitting on his special seat on the Million Merrily, seemingly still but anyone with a keen sense can see his vibrating softly. Anyone with haki can tell that contained with in him is the combined efforts of sixteen energy drinks swirling in the pit of his stomach and ready to be unleashed upon the world--

Over the journal, though, his voice is calm, almost preternaturally so. The kind of stillness you get before the storm]

I understand it now. I understand everything.

Thank you, Ace...

[ooc: action for Straw Hat Host Club Alliance or Spades. Feel free to run into him crashing around your ship, raiding your food or causing general mayhem]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[listens intently!

Vegetables, though?]

You finf fo? [hard to speak with Sanji's hand in his face so he snaps himself back to the porthole and squirms and wriggles, twisting his body around and around to try and get himself through]

Maybe I can give her a carrot or a cucumber... but it's gotta have eyes or oil on it so she can sleep with it. [he tilts his head upside down to look at Sanji] Why are girls so weird? I don't think Nami or Robin's ever wanted to sleep with a vegetable...

[Definitely not gonna bother helping him through the porthole, though that's in part because his now fragile brain just splintered even more and he's kind of rooted to the spot and thinking in a weird way about ladies and fucking vegetables—nnggh, shitty vegetables, let's go with that.

aklsdhfkljs.

He presses a hand just under his nose in case there's any untimely nosebleeds on the way. 8|

Goddamn cucumbers, gaaaahhhh. Maybe Zoro has a point about where he keeps his brain.]

...No, you definitely don't want to give her anything like...that. And say it's from you. To help satisfy her maidenly desires. She might actually kill you.

[Ahahahahaaakalsjhfs where is the nearest wall he can bang his head against.]

[he's not so sure about that but]

pbbt hahahaha Sanji's face looks really weird right now!

[struggle, struggle twist finally he gets his hips free and slides into the galley upside down as he works his legs free.]

You wanna give Kodacchan vegetables too?

Edited 2014-04-10 23:24 (UTC)

[Chokes.]

Sh-shut up! Shitty rubber idiot! I'm not going to give Kodacchan anything! I don't even know who that is, and more fucking importantly, where the hell did you meet her and how did this shit even manage to come up in conversation??!

Yeah you do! [pull pull] You were gonna be her slave! [one leg free]

I don't remember where I met her but we're gonna go on a date. [yep] So I gotta give her something special. [other leg free and he's standing up and brushing down his shorts]

[Scoffs!]

I'm not gonna be anyone's shitty slave, don't be stupid.

[Rubs his chin with a thoughtful look, seemingly not at all impressed with Luffy squeezing himself through the porthole like some kind of squishy octopus.]

There are a lot of things you could get her probably. ...Just not vegetables. I'd whip up some chocolate or something if I didn't think it'd all disappear down your throat before you gave it to her—

[Abrupt realization that this is LUFFY and he's talking to him about DATING, like...for real, what the fuck, is this actually happening? Nah...Luffy probably misinterpreted something somewhere.

He stares at him.]

You didn't eat something weird or try to smoke anything funny, did you?

[nod nod nod. Not really listening so much as peering around the kitchen and then peering under the chairs and then sort of vibrating in place because ennnerrrgyyyy]

No. Ace gave me some cool stuff though.

I know! Let's bring her meat!

[Watches with a somewhat confused frown.]

The hell are you looking for?

[...Wait.]

Ace did what? WHAT cool stuff??