piratejournal | [01] - Voice/Action

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[01] - Voice/Action

[Somebody chose the wrong time to wind up in another world, apparently. Hikaru is currently more than a little unnerved by the events unfolding around him, and by the more recent entries in the weird book he's been given. He's not aware that he is currently making his own contribution to the book's pages, and is sitting on a barrel on the outskirts of the market on Isla Empieza.]

What the hell is going on here?!

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Are you seriously trying to tell me that's all? [He asks it incredulously. Come on, he knows something's not right. There's no way being apart for just a little bit--

Something falls into place in his head. Kyouya had said that he'd been here for months, and Tamaki had said the same. They'd told him that people don't notice each other-missing.

But--no way, he'd notice if his own twin was replaced by a cyborg, right?

The light of realization has dawned upon him, but he really, really doesn't want to actually know the answer to this.]

Kaoru... how long is 'a little bit', exactly?

((Damnit. Kaoru ducks his head, a little ashamed, then lifts his shoulders, curling inward a little and looking away from his brother.))

... since October. So that'd be, um... three months. ((He lets out a little huff of breath, his voice deathly quiet as he speaks again, sounding like he's trying to convince himself of the following fact:)) Not that long.

[It feels like he's been punched in the gut. Three months. THREE MONTHS. He's shut down a bit trying to process that. Three months. That's--that's crazy. No way. He would have noticed! But, Kaoru wouldn't lie about that. It's easy to dismiss Tamaki and even Kyouya, because who knows what goes on in their heads? It's much harder to brush it off when it's his twin.

He wants to ask Kaoru if he's crazy - three months not a long time, ha! - but he's not so stupid he can't recognize a coping mechanism when he sees one.]

Three... th-three...

[Good job, you broke him.]

This is why I didn't want to tell you. ((He says, shaking his head immediately and lifting his hands to Hikaru's cheeks.)) I knew you'd be stupid about it. It's over, okay? You're here. No more problems, and no more worrying.

Or else I'll beat you up or something.

Who's the stupid one! How long did you think you'd be able to hide that from me? [He's a bit grumpy. Saying he's the one reacting stupidly... he's not the one who tried to pretend nothing was wrong.

He raises one of his hands to cover one of Kaoru's, grasping it tightly.]

Were you hoping I just wouldn't notice, or something?

I mean, as long as you didn't ask... ((Kaoru fidgets uncomfortably, turning away a little with a guilty look on his face.)) I knew you'd worry - but it honestly doesn't matter.

In what universe would I not ask?

[He sighs, moving his hand to place on Kaoru's own cheek. His intention is to turn his twin's face back towards him if he's turned away far enough to warrant it, otherwise it's just there. He doesn't like not being able to look Kaoru in the eyes at points like this.]

How can you just say it doesn't matter? Of course it does. You think I can't imagine what that would be like?

[He gives himself a moment to cool down, then continues, more softly and with a large helping of sincerity. He knows he's already apologised, but... he didn't actually know what for.]

...I'm sorry for leaving you alone for so long, Kaoru. I won't let it happen again.

[Also he totally didn't even notice you were missing, and that's killing him with guilt.]

Edited 2014-01-20 21:15 (UTC)

How? Because I don't want you to get like this. I don't want you to imagine it. You'll overexaggerate in your mind and then beat yourself up. ((Kaoru tsks, leaning in to press his forehead to Hikaru's firmly.)) Don't apologize. It's not your fault.

It's not just that. Kaoru, I...

[He grimaces, averting his eyes. How to say this delicately? He doesn't even want to say it, really, but he's never been the type to hide things from Kaoru.]

I... didn't even realise you were gone.

[GUILTGUILTGUILT HE IS THE WORST BROTHER EVER GUILT GUILT GUILT

His eyes may be a bit watery with ALL THIS GUILT rolling off him in waves.]

I know, Hikaru. Scurvey Dog told me. That's- the only reason I didn't go crazy when I first came here. Knowing that you'd be okay, that you wouldn't be freaking out - that kept me calm.

What?

[Kaoru knows about the cyborg replacements?!]

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