[written] - private to parfaitsamurai

[maskedtyrant]

[Codi has probably put far too much time into this than is really reasonable. The idiot who took up the 'first question slot' in Scurvy Dog's update earlier in the week was apparently someone people knew, but not someone that she knew herself; it took some back-tracking through her journal, sifting through the entries of others to track down his name so that she could request a private message--which in itself required some trial-and-error, seeing what commands it would respond to and quickly scratching out the bits that didn't work, until finally she tried the obvious and simply asked the silly thing to lock it. This appears to have worked.]

Only Gintoki Sakata should see this. If not, I don't think it matters--we all know what it is you want.

[It required some shopping around to find that green ink, and it takes her a while to write so meticulously, but anonymity is important here.]

You can call me the Tyrant. I understand that there's a particular work of literature that you're anxious to get your hands on? Something by the name of Shonen Jump?

What would you say if I happened to have come into possession of multiple issues of this work?

Comments

[parfaitsamurai]

...Are they new issues? I don't wanna be stuck with the beginning of S*int Se*ya.

[maskedtyrant]

They appear quite new, yes.

[Mint-condition, in fact! New issues? How the hell would she know?]

Would you rather be stuck with none at all? I had to go to great lengths to get these.

[parfaitsamurai]

No, no, alright, alright, I got it. Let's say I had a hypothetical interest in these hypothetical issues - what would you hypothetically want for them?

[maskedtyrant]

That depends. What would you hypothetically be willing to give? Hypothetically.

[parfaitsamurai]

Would you be hypothetically interested in a loud idiot who is hypothetically useful to have around?

[maskedtyrant]

Very hypothetically--it's my understanding that you already have a crew and that they don't find you very useful at all.

[The reactions to his little outburst a few days ago were evidence enough of that.]

They could be mistaken, of course. You'd have to convince me otherwise.

[parfaitsamurai]

...Oi, why would you assume I was talking about myself there, huh?!

[maskedtyrant]

Call it a hunch. In any case, I don't deal in human exchanges without their consent, so you either offer your services or you offer something else that isn't conscious and won't give me trouble.

[CALLIN' YO BLUFF--but also giving an exit, because this is incredibly entertaining.]

Would you like to try again?

[parfaitsamurai]

Then you better check whatever it is you're using for hunches. Are you sure it's working properly? Better give it a tug or two.

[either way he probably could have sent Sakamoto over without the guy noticing it, but knowing him he'd get sent back within the day. Better to shorten the whole process]

How about a parrot? Very smart one, at that!

[maskedtyrant]

Your interesting sense of humor is noted. Now how about something useful?

[parfaitsamurai]

That wasn't a joke. I'd really love to get rid of that thing.

Well, I'm out of ideas. What do you want?

[maskedtyrant]

[Well, it was worth testing the waters to see what he was willing to part with...not enough, though. Let's give him an unreasonable poke and see what happens.]

Something that you actually consider of value. The next shard of the Piedra Roja, perhaps? A step closer to your home for something from home.

[parfaitsamurai]

Oi, oi, even if I did find a piece of the Sh*kon jewel, what makes you think the rest of the people here would wanna trade it for Jump? Moechika might be the type of guy who'd treat you worse than a bird, but he's a sensitive soul, you know? He'll end up crying or something.

[maskedtyrant]

Of course it'd be the next one your crew finds, but now that you mention it, I would be very surprised if those traveling with you would leave you and the gem piece alone for any extended period of time.

Direct wealth would be a lot easier. Your crew hunts for treasure, yes? Or finds a way to make a decent income on your travels? Do they give you a cut?

[parfaitsamurai]

Are you trying to hurt my feelings? What did poor Gin-san ever do you to?

How much of my very, VERY small cut are we talking about, here?

[maskedtyrant]

Three-quarters. If you decide that your cut is perhaps a bit more than you first thought--or you come into more wealth through other means--I'll settle for half.