piratejournal | 019 ♔ voice/ action on the Nightfury backdated to the 4th

Day three hundred and eighty seven.

Three hundred and sixty seven days since the day I first boarded the USS Booyakasha. Three hundred and twenty nine days since the first time I got stabbed. Two hundred and eighty nine days since I felt true heart break. Then again forty eight days later, and again thirteen days ago.

One hundred and eighty nine days since I got my first tattoo. Three hundred days since I got my first weapon. One hundred and eighty days since I last kissed a man and actually enjoyed it.

Three days since my hair turned short and black. Thirty three days since I admitted that I loved someone. Two days since I got shot and twenty one days till my birthday.

I like counting days. It lessens the blow to the fact that I've been away from my life and my friends and my family for a full year now.

...Marco, darling. I sent you a flower crown over the nav. I hope you like it.

[To anyone who actually needed her, she was in her library. Predenting to study, but really silently contemplating on life while she played with her crew ring]

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[That helplessness....]

[He recognizes all too well.]

[How many of those he loved would die no matter what he did?]

[Does it even count here? He's not closer to getting Ace back and he needs to. Needs to try something.]

[Then what...]

[Does it matter?]

[He can't answer her. He couldn't answer Thatch either.]

[Is that the distance of what it means to be a phoenix? Or is it just Marco being an asshole?]

[He doesn't know.]

Spring is...

[Eyes closed so he can drift off into memories.] My father always wanted to make sure I'd have the best memories in spring. He knew how I feel about it. But it serves as a reminder of how fleeting everything is.

[What was the point of one happy moment in a sea of misery? But still, it was important, wasn't it? He had this discussion with Ikki once. It was never resolved though.]

It's my father's birthday. [The sixth.]

I find being a captain in his footsteps intolerable. It seems I shall always want to please a dead man, and I feel like a child for wishing to seek his counsel, but even on the last day I had with him, he had so much to teach me, and I had too much to learn.

[~~Probably him being an asshole~~]

Anything I can do?

Just forgive my bleakness, eh? This too shall pass.

Have you found your captain yet?

There's nothing to forgive, Marco. I'm neither annoyed nor mad. Just a little worried. But that's just me. I get worried easily.

And yes, we found him. Which was half the reason I got shot in the first place.

Oh? I thought it was in the battle Roxas fell.

Nah, I wasn't a part of that. I went on a hike and came back to a beat up crew and a dead Roxas. Some acting captain I turned out to be, eh?

But no, Kitty and Roxas surfaced at Corsair and I decided to pick him up with our new guy. Then, in a fit of blind rage, I decided to send the new guy on his own while I bombed the naval base as a distraction. I'm such a smart girl.

Cynthia... if you're going to be a pirate, don't start with copying me and my brothers. You have to do it your own way.

Read the Art of War, eh? If your captain doesn't have a copy, I'll send you one.

[That makes her smile. You're being cute, Marco. Stop it!]

Excuse you, I wasn't trying to copy anyone. Love can make a person do stupid things. Rage can too. So a mix of both was just a horrible explosion waiting to happen. But I'll look out for that book. With all the bulk book shopping that I do, I'm sure I have a copy laying around here somewhere.

That's exactly what I mean, yoi. Love and rage are our standard modus operandi!

At least play it smart, eh? It's fine to explode with either or both, but you can't do it like an idiot.

I must be in the wrong crew then.

[That...actually came out of her mouth. Wow. Hopefully no one heard her say it.]

Now now, I had a plan. I'm not crazy.

Don't tempt me.

I promised I would never covet another captain's nakama. Too much like Shanks. Or the others that wanted to kidnap me.

Oh? And what was the grand plan?

I want to call it a large scale game of Marco Polo with flaming meteors and pointy rocks. I hide on one side, attack the other side, wait for everyone to go to the attacked side, and fly out the other way. It actually went pretty flawlessly till the less guarded side saw me and decided "Let's shoot her". Hypnosis could only work so well, it seems.

And what is a nakama anyway? You always use that term, but you never tell me what it means.

Aye, at least you had a plan. Read that book, eh? You'll find it useful I'm sure.

Nakama are crewmates. Companions. They share with you a journey through part of life. Some nakama are forever, and those are family. Others are more complicated.

Like Ning...

He promised me to look after his own like family, but I suppose I'm still too childish. I don't let go easily.

Or ever.

You should smile, Marco. I'm sure he'd like that.

Gan Ning?

I very much doubt that.

He didn't even want to associate with Grell because she's my closest ally and sister.

Any smiles I had for him would probably make him worry about who I plan to kill.

Well fine, he won't. But if you smile, I'll smile, and he'll definitely like that.

I like it when you smile, Marco.

Then for you I'll save one.

Just in case it doesn't make him smile and drives him crazy instead.

[Marco is a pirate, did you ever doubt?]

And you'd just love that, wouldn't you?

Unabashedly.

[At least he's honest about it?]

Just think, he can't make me smile, yet his "worst enemy" could do it so easily. But I'm sure my smile wouldn't even come close to a priority to him. But we'll see...

So, will I be seeing you at the summit?