Ishida Mitsunari ▽ 石田三成 (
curseking) wrote in
piratejournal2014-12-17 08:31 pm
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006. voice/action for the katabami
[These innocuous mechanical birds seem to be causing something of a stir, and Mitsunari has to wonder why. So when he realizes one of them has silently perched itself on his scabbard (he has so few valuable possessions, everything important to him is kept on his person) he picks it up and finds himself listening to the song it has to sing.
Unimpressed and wondering what's so offensive about it aside from being dull, (as if he has any right to criticize needless upset) he starts to set the bird down somewhere, only for the song to fade and for a very familiar voice to come through instead. He can't possibly be hearing the voice he thinks -- he knows -- he is.]
...Lord... Hanbei? Are you -- ?!
[He believes, for one wonderful instant, that it may be Hanbei Takenaka himself speaking through this bird, but the words are ones he's heard before. It's like a memory being played out over radio. He can barely speak, so he listens instead, captivated and confused and hurting.
The voice eventually changes, and it is still so achingly familiar. He could not possibly forget who it belongs to. It's the voice he's wished more than any other that he could hear just one more time, even if doing so would open up a wound that never healed in the first place.
He listens. It's as if the bird is repeating everything his lord Hideyoshi had to say to him within those final few days of his life. Be it orders or praise or scolding, they're all precious memories.
The last thing the bird repeats is not a memory -- it's not Mitsunari's memory, that is. But Mitsunari thinks he knows what he's been given the privilege of hearing. Words he'd thought forever lost on the one person who surely deserved to hear them least.
Lord Hideyoshi's last words, it seems, were to Hanbei.
Mitsunari will be found in a strange mood for as long as these birds are around. This has spurred all kinds of conflicting emotions he really doesn't know how to deal with, but it's those final thoughts that have had the biggest effect. This isn't the closure he believes vengeance would bring -- in fact, his emotional damage feels more raw than ever -- but at least now he can finally stop wondering what passed through his lord's head at the end of his life. He was not ashamed or defeated, and he did not waver.
And Mitsunari feels that, if nothing else, the resolve in his own heart has strengthened.]
---
Lord Hanbei... Lord Hideyoshi... I have heard their voices once again.
[In Mitsunari's view, these little birds are kind of miraculous.]
Ieyasu... try all you like. You cannot take this from me!
[Part of him had been wary, and he had wondered if he could trust some of what he heard. But he knows Hideyoshi's voice, and could not mistake it or be fooled by an imposter. And he knows his lord's nature well enough that he has no doubt he would address Hanbei in his final moments. In fact, there would be nothing more like him. That was Hideyoshi.
Quieter, and to himself:]
Lord Hideyoshi... was this your wish...?
[Or was it just by someone else's whim that he was able to hear what he did? Perhaps he'll never know.]
Unimpressed and wondering what's so offensive about it aside from being dull, (as if he has any right to criticize needless upset) he starts to set the bird down somewhere, only for the song to fade and for a very familiar voice to come through instead. He can't possibly be hearing the voice he thinks -- he knows -- he is.]
...Lord... Hanbei? Are you -- ?!
[He believes, for one wonderful instant, that it may be Hanbei Takenaka himself speaking through this bird, but the words are ones he's heard before. It's like a memory being played out over radio. He can barely speak, so he listens instead, captivated and confused and hurting.
The voice eventually changes, and it is still so achingly familiar. He could not possibly forget who it belongs to. It's the voice he's wished more than any other that he could hear just one more time, even if doing so would open up a wound that never healed in the first place.
He listens. It's as if the bird is repeating everything his lord Hideyoshi had to say to him within those final few days of his life. Be it orders or praise or scolding, they're all precious memories.
The last thing the bird repeats is not a memory -- it's not Mitsunari's memory, that is. But Mitsunari thinks he knows what he's been given the privilege of hearing. Words he'd thought forever lost on the one person who surely deserved to hear them least.
Lord Hideyoshi's last words, it seems, were to Hanbei.
Mitsunari will be found in a strange mood for as long as these birds are around. This has spurred all kinds of conflicting emotions he really doesn't know how to deal with, but it's those final thoughts that have had the biggest effect. This isn't the closure he believes vengeance would bring -- in fact, his emotional damage feels more raw than ever -- but at least now he can finally stop wondering what passed through his lord's head at the end of his life. He was not ashamed or defeated, and he did not waver.
And Mitsunari feels that, if nothing else, the resolve in his own heart has strengthened.]
---
Lord Hanbei... Lord Hideyoshi... I have heard their voices once again.
[In Mitsunari's view, these little birds are kind of miraculous.]
Ieyasu... try all you like. You cannot take this from me!
[Part of him had been wary, and he had wondered if he could trust some of what he heard. But he knows Hideyoshi's voice, and could not mistake it or be fooled by an imposter. And he knows his lord's nature well enough that he has no doubt he would address Hanbei in his final moments. In fact, there would be nothing more like him. That was Hideyoshi.
Quieter, and to himself:]
Lord Hideyoshi... was this your wish...?
[Or was it just by someone else's whim that he was able to hear what he did? Perhaps he'll never know.]
[Action]
"If both parties still live"...
Mitsunari glances down at the little bird he's still holding. If Ieyasu were dead, what would he hear the bird say? Would he hear an apology? Ha. Hardly, he thinks. Ieyasu is too proud. Would he curse him, then? Or would play the role of the self-righteous saint he clearly thinks he is and act like he's above that?
Ultimately Mitsunari can't say for sure what Ieyasu would want him to hear, because when he calls on those long-tarnished memories of his former friend, it's as if he's watching a stranger who happens to wear his face.]
I could never stoop to reconciling with Ieyasu...! Not if my very life depended on it!
[Forgiveness would do a disservice to Hideyoshi's memory, he believes.]
Ieyasu's heart... The Ieyasu I believed I knew, he is as lost as can be!
[That man is gone and he's never coming back, and Mitsunari is sure he would hate him all the same even if he did somehow return, grovelling for forgiveness he wouldn't deserve. He would kill him without question no matter how sorry he was, because there's no other way to make up for a sin this grave.
Maybe if he had just left Hideyoshi alive... maybe then, things would be different, but --
No, it's useless to think about. Mitsunari frowns. How could he entertain such a stupid thought, even for a moment?]
[Action]
He's the same as he ever was, I think.
[His eye flicks to the side, trying to gauge whether an explosion is imminent.]
He'd hold his hand out to you if he thought you'd take it. It's only because he knows you won't that he fights against you.
[He thinks both of them are fools for it, too, but they're both far too stubborn to listen to him about it.]
[Action]
Of course I wouldn't! I would sooner cut that very hand off!
[It doesn't cross his mind that these kind of threats might bother Motochika. Ieyasu is a "villain", so what does it matter if he says these things, even to the face of one of his closest friends?
It's justified. He knows it is.]
But you are wrong -- Ieyasu does not want reconciliation in the first place!
[Action]
[Motochika unfolds his arms and places his hands on his hips instead, so he can more easily look up at the sky in exasperation.]
He wants peace and it wants it made by his own hand. If he could gain it through regaining your friendship, he would do so, but he's no doubt gotten it into his head that he can't and so he's decided the quickest way to get what he wants is to fight you for control of the land. He's a good lad, truly, and his heart is in the right place, but his eyes are a bit too fixed on that goal of his.
[Action]
[It makes very little sense from Mitsunari's (...considerably biased) perspective.]
I cannot stand to hear you speak so highly of him as you do! Why is it you don't see what is so clear to me?!
[It isn't as if Motochika is being uncritical here -- far from it. But to Mitsunari, anything remotely positive is unacceptable. His anger finally boils over, and he has to take his anger out on something. Not the little bird, as it's far too precious, and he has reason enough to refrain from harming Motochika; he lashes out uselessly at the ship instead, striking the blunt hilt of his sword against its side.]
-- What should be clear to everyone!
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[Not at all what Mitsunari wants to hear, but...]
Now kindly leave my ship out of this.
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[That struck a nerve, oh yes. Mitsunari is wearing a positively murderous expression.]
I had everything taken from me, and you dare to say to my face you've no quarrel with anything that happened?!
[He points his sword at Motochika instead.]
When this sword is soaking in that bastard Ieyasu's blood, don't you dare complain to me of the tragedy of it all!
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You had everything taken, but only because you would not allow yourself anything other than what he gave you, or at least you wouldn't recognize it. You had one friend, mad though he was [Or, well, is, considering this isn't the exact Mitsunari he knows from home.], you had another that chose a path you couldn't follow him on, and you'd no doubt have others if you allowed it. Yet that matters little to you because of the loss of one man. How many men did you kill in his name? How many of them had families and friends who are now as bereft as you are? You are not the only man in the world who suffers, Mitsunari, and believe me, far more people suffer because of Hideyoshi rather than suffer over him.
[Not at all wise to say, not with a sword pointed at him, but even Motochika has his limits and he's been bashing his head up against this wall for far, far too long. He may not always agree with Ieyasu's methods, but he can't argue with his goals. A world united in peace is far, far better than a world dominated by strength.
It also really doesn't help that it's an injury to his own pride to hear Mitsunari continue to moan and groan about his suffering. Has Motochika not given him a place to live here? Has he not reached out his hand in friendship? Has he not kept an eye out for his well-being as much as anyone can? What more is there that he can do? Very little, to be honest, and this is the thanks he gets for it, it seems.]
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You paint Lord Hideyoshi as a tyrant when he was nothing of the sort! It is only because he lived that I lived as well!
His dream was to fortify the country, not destroy it! All who would stand in the way of that dream must surrender or die! It was their own folly for continuing to jeopardize the unification he sought!
[Mitsunari has given no thought to the families of all those he's cut down. If people must grieve for their loved ones because those men stood in Hideyoshi’s way -- so what? In war, people die.]
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Do you even listen to the words that come out of your own mouth? It's taken this long for you to accept that my loss may be as great as your own, but now you're right back to saying that yours is the only one that ever mattered! Someone else saw a better path to unification, rose up, and through greater strength struck your lord down just as Hideyoshi struck down anyone who stood in his way. I can understand your grief at the loss of a man who was your lord and perhaps even someone you saw as a father, even your anger at the man who struck him down, but I can't wrap my head around how utterly bullheaded you're being about the whole thing! Do you truly think you're the only one who's ever suffered such a thing? I too suffered the loss of the only lord I ever served, but you don't see me kicking up a fuss about it and refusing to move on! I shouldered the burden he left me, took up his dreams and realized them. Perhaps you should give some thought as to why you aren't doing that.
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Lord Hideyoshi is like a god to me!
[And that there is the crux of why it's so hard for him to fathom how other people could suffer like him, and why moving on is such a difficult task. Lord Hideyoshi was someone unlike any other. He was different.
But... "Perhaps you should give some thought as to why you aren't doing that."
It's like what Kodachi accused him of, isn't it? Why hasn't he taken on Hideyoshi's dreams and tried to realize them himself? Because --
Because he doesn't need to. Not when he's made his wish upon the gemstone.]
And when his life has been saved he will be the one who carries on his own ambitions and dreams!
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[He can't leave things with that question. He knows Mitsunari is confident enough in his ability to change the course of history that thinking on that question isn't going to change anything.]
You're only making excuses not to live the life you have now! If you won't move forward, what more can I do for you? Yours may not be the life that I spared, but it is still one that is under my care.
[And despite his own complaints about damage to his ship, he punches the rail out of frustration. In a way, it's a blow to his ego, but it also cuts deeper than that. His crew is his family and he wants to ease their suffering in any way he can, but Mitsunari doesn't want his suffering eased, as far as Motochika can tell. He doesn't want to write him off as a lost cause. He's only ever done that with one man and it was painful even then, even though he had every right not to see it that way.]
What does it take to make you see the living beyond the dead, Mitsunari?
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Well. First he would target Davy Jones and get revenge somehow, but after that... no, he doesn't know. He'd be back at square one. Listless and purposeless. It's a horrible thought.]
Making excuses to -- ?! Shut your mouth at once, or...
[Mitsunari is seething. But in spite of his outrage, Motochika's words bring something to mind, and it is the promise he himself made to Motochika that he would try and live his life. It's too late to take that back.
And he wisely makes the decision to cut short what he was saying before he says something else he can't take back.
What does it take for Mitsunari to let go of the dead? Perhaps if he'd never heard of the Piedra Roja he'd have had no other choice. Its supposed powers have given him hope, but at the same time, the gem's existence has set him up for even greater disappointment in the long term.]
...No... I don't give a damn about moving on! I want for my life to return to the way it was before Ieyasu committed betrayal! That is all!
[Finally, Mitsunari stops threatening Motochika with his sword and slams it back into its sheath. His hands are shaking.]
There is your answer, Motochika!
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Motochika grabs on to Mitsunari's shoulders, just short of shaking him.]
Then what of all of us you've come to know since then? Is none of this of any importance to you?!
[How blind can one man be to what's around him?]
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This world has never been anything more than a precursor to the world I want!
And you all...
["Friend" isn't a word he can easily bring himself to apply to anyone, but there are people here on this ship -- not many, but a few -- who he counts as allies. That is just one more thing the heat of the moment has blinded him to.
Motochika is difficult to classify. He's sympathetic to Ieyasu and Mitsunari has yet to forget that he opposed Hideyoshi, but Motochika has never made himself Mitsunari's enemy. If he had, they wouldn't be having this conversation at all.]
My allies here cannot join me there!
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[He lets him go roughly and takes a step back, face darkening. It takes a lot to disturb him this deeply, but he's heard this logic before and nothing good ever came of it. Despite his best efforts, here's Mitsunari echoing it and it chills his heart to hear it.]
What will you do if I refuse you the use of the shards I carry? Am I of no more use to you then? A man who makes a world for himself will soon find himself the only one in it.
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[What Motochika says, however, disturbs him in turn.]
What do you mean, the only one in it...? I'll be anything but alone!
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Motochika shakes his head, irritated all the more at this.]
For a time, aye, but for how long? No man lives for an eternity. I suppose you'll be wanting to go ahead of them to spare yourself that. And who will remember you then?
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[Mitsunari's obsession runs alarmingly deep, but it isn't always evident just how deep until he starts fielding questions like these.]
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[He wants to just turn on his heel and storm off, but he hesitates for a moment, just hoping he might get the sort of response he wants out of that.]
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Begone.