piratejournal | [voice - and forever action for Spades]

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[voice - and forever action for Spades]

You know, it really sucks when people disappear... One of my best friends is gone and... it hurts. She was real important to me. I've been here for more than a year now, and there are people here that I'd do anything for. So of course it stings when they're gone. But...

...but instead of just being sad all the time, I think this means that we should always be grateful for the people that we do have, all the awesome friends that are still with us. If anything, we should keep them as close as we can, have as much fun as we can. No one knows what's gonna happen tomorrow.

So get together with the people you care about the most, and the ones you love the most. Make sure they know just how much they mean to you.

Have fun, everyone!

[Private to Spades]

Hey guys - wanna hang out? I'm up on deck if you wanna join in - I've got drinks and candy, and I've brought my guitar too! See ya soon!

*Of course she knows that she's not the only Spade that will be hurting with Chandra's disappearance. But instead of wallowing or running away, Selphie has chosen the happier option. Out on deck, Selphie has dragged her own duvet and pillows, and Chandra's too. There are a few bottles of various alcohols (including one very bright green one, and a very bright pink one - obviously Selphie's own choices), and there was a small spread of her own personal supply of candy. Selphie sat on a pillow, waiting to see if anyone would come along to keep her company, strumming her guitar and singing softly*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

A picnic in space... And a barbecue? If I remember well Ace once talked about wanting to do one in a "weird place" or something like that.

[He just hums in response, if Selphie can't use magic or something with her music then the most damage she could cause would be by using the guitar as a blunt weapon. And that would likely leave her without it. Hardly a good idea.

He's silent as she mentions how, if she was taught, it's a memory that she lost. He knows what's like to losing a memory, though in his case it was due the interference of other people and he never realized or knew it until they undid the spell. Selphie, however, is aware that she's missing memories and it's something he can't really imagine. Does she know because someone who knew her from a time she didn't remember told her so? Or does she just notice the holes in her memories? Not that it really matters either way.]

...-Teach me?

So long as no one sets my space ship on fire, I'll be okay with that!

*She smiles, now having all sorts of images in her head of having a big party on a ship. When he asks her to teach him, though, she does a kind of double take, blinking at him*

You wanna know how to play?

*Not that she was going to deny him - it was just unexpected to hear him ask. But once she was done with blinking and staring at him, perhaps for longer than necessary, Selphie smiled at him brightly*

Sure!

*Then she lifted the guitar from her lap and carefully handed it over to Ikki*

I don't know much about space ships, but I doubt they are made of wood. And we've been sailing in ships made of wood for over a year, with at least seven people who use fire. Regularly. If we haven't set any of those ships on fire yet, I don't think we can do it with a space ship.

[Actually, now that he thinks of it, how come they have never had one of the ships burning? Sure, maybe there have been one or two small fires but nothing like a Viking funeral.

When she stares at him, Ikki looks away, frowning a bit and with a light blush climbing over his cheeks. It's not so much that he's interested in it, but... He remembers Seiya playing the guitar and this also sounds like a good way to get closer to her.]

It's just... Sounds like a good excuse to spend time with you. And it would give you a memory, sure it won't be how you were taught, but how to teach me... I guess that's close enough? Though if you don't want to-...!

[Suddenly there's a guitar in his hands and he has to awkwardly set aside the bottle he was holding. It's now his turn to stare at the guitar and her as if he had never seen either of them. And for holding the guitar awkwardly and totally wrong.]

Uh, you want to start right now?

Nah - they're made of metal, I guess. And some other stuff. But yeah, the more fires we can avoid, the better. At least while being stuck up in space!

*Selphie tilts her head at him, noticing the frown and being surprised to see that small blush of his too. Her own cheeks mirror a similar colour when he's honest about why he'd like to learn from her. Selphie bites her lip, though still smiles at the gesture*

Well, you can at least try playing some random notes for now.

*She shuffles a little closer as she sees how he's holding the instrument, not that there was much space between them anyway. Selphie lifts one of his hands at a time so that he can hold the guitar more comfortably*

There. That's it!

*Then she points at each of the strings, naming each of them in turn, before making strumming motions with her fingers*

So, you wanna kinda pluck each of the strings, like this.

[He's silent and doesn't move an inch when she shuffles even closer and fixes the way he holds the guitar. He grips the guitar a bit more confidently, finding that, indeed, this is a more comfortable way to hold it. He still shifts a bit until he finds a way so that he's not uncomfortable sitting with the guitar there, but it doesn't last long.

Despite his lack in actual interest in the guitar, Ikki finds himself listening to Selphie with attention, committing to memory everything she says. However, he makes a face when she reaches the part about plucking the strings.]

... With how much strength do I have to pluck them?

[He's pretty sure he could snap them after all if not careful.]

*When he finally gets round to sitting comfortably with the guitar, Selphie leans back to take in the full effect and nods in approval*

You got it - it really suits you, too.

*But then, this was Ikki. She'd find him attractive whatever he was holding in his hands. She smiles gently then reaches forward to demonstrate with one of the strings*

Only gently. Otherwise, the strings might snap, and that it really will hurt.

Suits me... Does that mean I look good with one in my arms?

[He chuckles, for a moment his thoughts getting distracted from the guitar and filled with Selphie. He doesn't realize how he ends openly staring at her with a small smile and a longing expression in his eyes until he sighs. As soon as he realizes it, though he quickly shakes his head and turns his attention again to the instrument.]

Gently...

[There are actually many types of gently for Ikki. He tries to pluck them with the same gentleness with which he caresses Shun's hair, which is... So gently that the strings barely resonate, producing only a soft humming like sound, because when he caresses Shun's hair it's done in a way that the other won't notice it much. Afraid of really fully touching him after everything he has done.]

That wasn't any good, was it?

Uh, well, yes... I guess it does.

*And those are arms that she can definitely get distracted looking at, especially when she recalls how good it feels to be held by them, suddenly feeling rather jealous of the guitar. Realising that she's been staring too, Selphie clears her throat and glances away also. She does turn back to see what he does with the guitar, tilting her head with a soft smile at the result*

It was just a little...quiet is all. Try again, a little harder this time.

A little harder...

[He takes a moment to try to determine the strength he should use next. It has to still be gentle but not as gentle as before so... He tries with the strength he would use to hold one of his brothers' shoulder, the result is good but maybe a bit too loud.]

Okay, even I can tell that was too much.

[So he tries again, lowering the strength. And then once more. And again. And another time. By his firth attempt in a row he finally gets a normal leveled sound, or at least he thinks it sounds closer to the volume she was playing at before. So he stops and looks at her expectantly.]

*Selphie just sits close by, patiently watching and waiting as he tries it out. When he does something well, she gives a nod and an encouraging smile. For the times it doesn't sound quite as good, she tilts her head as though waiting to hear him try again. So when he does finally pull the note just right, she grins and claps her hands together*

There, see? You're getting the hang of it just fine!

[He may be getting the hang of it, though he's not sure how. Not when he can feel his attention trying to get distracted with her, sitting so close, watching him so attentively. He even kept giving her quick sneaky looks as he fought with the guitar.]

I have a good teacher. Though probably for most people this isn't really as hard as its foe me.

[He plucks the strings randomly a bit more, getting used to the level of strength and memorizing it.]

They all sound the same the whole time. They sounded different at times when you played.

[Mostly because, despite holding the guitar, he's not doing anything with his other hand and thus isn't working to produce other notes.]

Tee hee! I do my best! And you're trying hard so that helps too!

*Though that compliment really does make Selphie smile, and she thinks for a moment that maybe she really could have been a teacher back home, like she'd planned. But it doesn't take long for all her attention to be back on Ikki*

Well, that's what the other hand is for. If you touch your fingers on different places then it has different effects. Uh...So, if you press a finger somewhere on the neck and strum, then you'll hear that it sounds different too before.

*She looks at the neck of the guitar and points to a place on it, leaning forward so that she can move his hand into position herself if he needs help with it*

[His eyes move to the neck of the guitar when she points at it, but are quick to shift over to her when she leans forward. Closer than before, close enough that he could just shift a little and just kiss her. He can feel her fingers on his hand, moving it into the proper position and he can't help but remember how those fingers felt tracing patterns over his skin that one night.

He doesn't really think of it before he actually shifts, quite naturally, to capture her lips with his own for a brief kiss. And only after he has done it, he... Notices what he has just done and casts around a quick glance, afraid that someone else had already come and seen them. God knows what they would think if they know that Selphie is in a relationship with Aya. Ikki wouldn't mind them thinking bad of him, since it's his fault, but they could also end thinking badly of her which she doesn't deserve.]

Er... So... I press the strings and they sound differently as I do it?

[Awkwardly trying to return his attention to the guitar, which could work if he actually looked at it instead of at her.]

*The closeness hasn't gone unnoticed by Selphie either, her own memories of that night coming back to her as she touches his hands, his fingers. She's suddenly aware of the way that he's looking at her, like he might kiss her, and it warms her cheeks.

Then he does, and she gasps softly in pleasant surprise. She too glances around, but since it doesn't seem like anyone noticed, she looks back at Ikki and wonders how possible it would be for her to sneak in another kiss. But, right, there's a guitar between them and he's asking about it*

Yeah...that's...that it...

[A nod follows her words as Ikki starts to pluck the strings again, this time pressing and releasing them at the neck of the guitar, noticing the different notes and changing his hand's position at times to get another note. There's no real pattern to it, just him getting used to it and trying to memorize how each note sounds.

Even so, his attention is still split and on her, sneaking glances at her face in search of... Anything, be it disgust or otherwise, something that would tell him what she thought of his kiss. Something that would give him a hint regarding if there's still a chance. Sure, she had done that little thing of pushing all those tasks on Asami and Bolin which had made him think she was jealous but... It could have been something else entirely. Or even if it was jealousy it didn't mean she would be receptive to more advances.]

Is it okay?

[Does he mean the notes he's making or the kiss? It's hard to say, though given how she doesn't seem to be disgusted, a small and warm smile starts to form in his lips. A bit more confident than how he really feels even.]

*The notes didn't sound all that bad, though they were quite randomly and clearly not part of any kind of real tune. But they sound clear enough, and he's clearly getting the hang of playing the strings. Her eyes watch his fingers, his hands, and occasionally flit up to his face to watch the concentration there. Really, it's amazing that they don't catch each other's eyes more. Maybe she should be more focused on his playing, but her lips still feel warm, even from that small kiss.

When he asks the question, Selphie looks up at him shyly, unsure herself of exactly what he means by that. But surely he isn't talking about this kiss - could he be? It definitely felt more than okay but... there are reasons why she hasn't just exchanged places with the guitar in his lap, and she feels guiltily aware that they both know this. It's much easier, for now, to go with thinking that he means the guitar*

Okay? Great! You'll be playing tunes in no time. It'll just take a few more lessons - I mean, if you even want to have a few more lessons that is...

[Again he simply nods, the movement being a bit heavier than before as his eyes fall on the guitar once more. There's only a second delay in his reply, though.]

I would like a few more lessons. I don't really see a reason to stop now that I've started learning, huh?

... Besides, I could do with a good "reminder". If you would help me with those lessons.

[He looks at her, only raising his eyes nervously. His tone drops so that only them both can hear it as well.]

Mhm, I guess so. But you shouldn't feel like you have to if you don't really like it all that much.

*When he says the word 'reminder' though, she could feel her chest surge full of warmth, and her cheeks too, turning an interesting pink colour. Is he saying what she thinks he's saying? She hopes so.

But before Selphie answers with enthusiasm she remembers something, or a someone. Her voice drops too, even if no one else might guess what they were talking about*

I think...I'd like to remind you, and to...be reminded.

*But there's a sense that she's holding something back. She's just too afraid to show her dpubts, that there's a small part of her that's torn, if only for guilt rather than anything else*

No, it's okay. I like it... I know Seiya knows how to play the guitar too, though I've not seen him with one often. So it's a way to think of my brothers without it being tied to the war.

And I want to give you new memories. Though I understand if you don't, they aren't the same as the ones you don't have anymore after all.

[His eyes shine at her next reply, though he can sense something even without using his Cosmos. He thinks for a moment before he smiles softly.]

Then we can help each other with reminding some things. It's easier that way, isn't it? If I had to remind it all alone I would probably forget something. I know I'm not the best option but if you won't regret asking me for help to remember...

*For Selphie, it feels so good to know that he cares so much, talking abput her memories in such a way. She smiles fondly at him and nods, though looks a little bashful*

Thank you. That's very kind. I like making memories with you.

*She smiles some more as he continuea, so happy with the way things are between them - so much frienddhip, compassion, not to mention all those much stronger feelings*

I don't regret asking you...not at all...

[He smiles as she says that she likes making memories with him, nodding.]

Then, let's try to make many memories for you. Good memories. And for me too, we both need them.

[And he wants them. Part of him is amazed that he has yet to screw up again with her and make her cry or suffer. But, then again, they had worked well as friends, it was when they put the label of couple on that things started to fall apart. He tried his best, he really did, he tried to think of her, to keep the promises he made to her, but from the start his priorities and hers were all in opposite directions. That he failed to understand the most basic, vital and important thing that she wanted from him didn't help.

He understands now, but it's way too late. Though his expression shows some light surprise at her words, wondering if she's aware of what she's saying.]

That's good... I don't regret it either. And I'm very glad that you want to help me to remember.

Okay! It's a deal! Let's make the best memories that we can for the both of us!

*Selphie smiles in return, holding out a hand with her pinky finger towards him, as though wanting to make a pinky promise on their deal. It was just so much fun, being friends with Ikki again, and she wanted to make it last as long as she could.

When she sees that expression of surprise, though, she lowers her eyes and blushes gently.Maybe she is picking up the wrong end of the stick. Still, she smiles and nods, looking into his eyes, down at his lips, and fighting the temptation to remind them both of hoe good the kissing feels*

[He pauses at the sight of the pinky finger, his face showing an expression he doesn't often show. It's hard to say if it's surprise or confussion, but it's clearly open and even vulnerable. After time of knowing him, it would be accurate to say that it's an "Ikki expression" rather an a "Phoenix Ikki expression", it makes him look far younger than he is. Hesitant and lost for a second even as he reaches out and wraps his own pinky around hers.

It's a simple act. A silly one even. But it's clear that it's not something he has ever done and he's not sure what to think of it. Or how to feel. Though after that initial moment he tries to cover it with a confident smile and some smugness.]

All right... You better not let me down on this, Selphie.

[Because she's the one who's more likely to cause bad memories to happen, of course. It's clear that he's not serious though.

His smile falls a bit at he see the way she lowers her eyes and blushes. There's a sound, a growl, soft but still clear enough for both of them, and it sounds pretty much like the growls he gave her back on the island on that night. His fingers idly pluck at the notes of the guitar, though his eyes stay on her face and keep falling on her lips.

She makes it really hard to not just drop the guitar and put her on his lap to at least kiss her. And she probably isn't even aware of that.]

*When she sees that vulnerable look on his face, Selphie almost doesn't know what to do. Her instinct is to reach over and snuggle him up close in a hug*

It's just a pinky promise. It won't hurt.

*She smiles when he wraps his finger with hers, and she leans forward a fraction to bring their thumbs close enough to touch too. At his comments though she rolls her eyes dramatically, then sticks out the end of her tongue*

Fine. But you'd better be ready for it, mister!

*She laughs at her teasing then stops, frozen for a second in her embarrassment. She had seen something in the way that he looked at her, and she was unsure of how to respond. The growl he made added yet more blushing to Selphie's cheeks*

So...are you...done for the lessons today? We can still hang out here, since it's nice but...if you want to take the guitar away with you to practise then that's okay...

I know it won't hurt! It's just... Nevermind.

[His complain is weak and he seems embarrassed by how she had to say that. It's not his fault, okay? So he has never had friends to make "pinky promises" with even when he was a kid, not even to his brother because those promises were childish and Ikki stopped being a child when Shun was born. Or so he tells himself at least, he had to be mature and old for both of them. And he has always thought, has always known, that promises are hard to keep, if not impossible. And that making them is pointless and stupid and, why is he bothering with this again?

Because it's Selphie. And somehow that makes everything make sense.

His smug smirk stays in place in front of her sticked out tongue, looking pretty confident and amused.]

Hn, you better be ready for a penalty if you fail, as well, little miss.

[His eyes glance around the deck for a moment before looking back at her. "If you want to take the guitar away with you", is that just an offer for him to keep the guitar to practice? Or a cue for an excuse to go to his room? Or maybe she just wants the guitar back if he's done for the moment... She has been responsive up until now, though so... Maybe... Maybe it's really a cue after all?]

Sounds good, I want to practice some more, or I'll forget quite quickly. But it's probably better if I do so in my room, so I don't break anyone's eardrums in the process. What do you think, am I good enough to practice without a teacher or is it better if you're with me some more so that I don't forget?

[Tentative, tentative...]

[voice - and forever action for Spades]

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