Marco the Phoenix (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fierybluebird) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
piratejournal2014-04-11 01:28 am
fierybluebird) wrote in piratejournal2014-04-11 01:28 am
[Voice & Written]
[He's going to regret this later, but there's a bunch of excitedly high-pitched chirps like a bird singing a love song.]
[That's okay. It matches the background sounds.]
[But FAR more embarrassing is the scribbles he makes into the journal:]
[So someone has a case of Spring Fever. Or maybe just a fever.]
[And then in big bold colorful levels Marco makes sure to add:]
FREE FLOWER CROWNS FOR EVERYONE WHO SIGNS UP NOW.
[Yeah. He's kind of lost it.]
[That's okay. It matches the background sounds.]
[But FAR more embarrassing is the scribbles he makes into the journal:]
[So someone has a case of Spring Fever. Or maybe just a fever.]
[And then in big bold colorful levels Marco makes sure to add:]
FREE FLOWER CROWNS FOR EVERYONE WHO SIGNS UP NOW.
[Yeah. He's kind of lost it.]
[Action]
He knows.
They have to breathe. To live.
It's not a choice like sleeping or resting. He hasn't been sleeping either, he meditated, keeping this place at bay, fighting it because there's no way he can give in to it. He hasn't been eating either, not even by asking Zeff to use the kitchen. He won't trust even the food that comes from here until they are far away.
But a break would be so nice.
Peace.
Joy.
Don't like it? Don't live. Such a simple idea. A simple solution.
He will get up again, after all. What is there to lose?
Out of all the times in which one could die, wouldn't now be the best time? When there isn't a war going on. When no one is in danger.
Marco could eat his flowers and be happy. Selphie would be happy. Everyone would be happy.
Except Thatch and Namur due the allergies. But then all they would have to do is the same as him. All they have to do is burn and then everything will be fixed.
He doesn't have to protect Athena. He doesn't have to protect anyone. He doesn't have to fight, so why does he do it? All he has to do is to die.
Stop breathing.
Burn himself down... No, that wouldn't work. It wouldn't last long enough. Drown himself, turn off his flames completely. Let Davy Jones take him.
Just die.
But Marco isn't resting. He doesn't rest, he doesn't relax. But he gets his flowers and his ducklings. Isn't he happier this way? Ikki doesn't have it. He won't allow it for himself. He won't bath dirty ducklings, he will squeeze them to death, he won't make flower crowns, he will just burn the forest down. He doesn't want to give in.
He doesn't want to shut up about his hate for this place.
So him having to die is the logical conclusion, isn't it?
Isn't it?]
I don't give a fuck about what that kid wants anymore.
[A kid. Not a woman. Not even a girl. Just a kid, a selfish blind brat that only sees and hears what she wants to. That claims to be a mercenary but he has yet to see anything in her that proves that, she can fight, yes, but so can others and not all of them are mercenaries or soldiers. Did she want to tame him? Maybe, hadn't she once been talking about him as if he was a thing? A pet? Thinking that he wouldn't hear because she didn't see him. Playing the poor victim who had been dumped by a cold jerk who had never cared about her, who hadn't talked with her in weeks, leaving aside the fact that she was the one who left to chase after someone else during that time with no warning. But she could do it. It was fine if she did it, because she was Selphie, she was the princess of her own story, he couldn't do it, he had to keep her informed of everything, he had to talk with her everyday. He had to go after her, because otherwise it would prove that he didn't love her.
But he did. He had loved her.
Now?
Now she could burn in Hell for all he cared. He's not a damn knight in shining armor. He's not going to bow down to anyone who asks him to. He's not her pet. And he's not going to cater to her needs and demands.]
I want to kill something.
[Something.
Someone.
Himself.
Either. Everything. It doesn't matter.
The more this place pushes him to its peace and order, the more the phoenix inside him rebels.
Burn.
Just burn it all. Burn them all. Burn yourself.
Life is much more endurable when seen through the flames.]
I need to.
[Action]
[She is a child.]
[But Ikki still cares.]
[Marco knows it.]
[He wouldn't be mad and hurting if he didn't care.]
[And that's why it bothers him.]
[He wished he knew how to help it.]
[Wished he could explode.]
[Ace explodes sometimes, but Marco never has before.]
[Marco doesn't explode, he just burns. When something has to be destroyed, he gets rid of it.]
[No mercy.]
We will.
We'll hunt down every last marine that touched this crew, that hurt Kairi, and we'll kill them so they'll know to never ever touch this family again.
[Family. Are they family? It hasn't been as long as Marco's used to calling his family members such. And he doesn't count Kairi on the same level as Leanne or Haruta, even though Kairi has been with them longer than Leanne. So isn't that unfair?]
[It doesn't matter. She doesn't have to be a little sister to be family. She's nakama. It's enough.]
[And vengeance is something he gets.]
[Ikki's violence had scared Selphie, wasn't it? And he was mad with himself for how he could still wind up hurting her in other ways.]
[So he hurt himself to try to keep her from being hurt more.]
[All messed up.]
Together. You and me.
No kids allowed.
[Because Marco wasn't going to just break necks.]
[He was going to send a very violent and very gruesome message.]
[And worse? He was going to enjoy it.]
Aggressive birds...
That what's Chandra said.
Phoenixes are really aggressive birds.
We don't like this.
[Such an understatement. He hated it. Hate it so much. Couldn't let Ikki go though, because he needed him. And he didn't care that it was selfish, because it wasn't a selfishness he afforded himself, that the world afforded him, but it was part of being a phoenix. And that meant that the other phoenix had to understand. Had to. And so Marco could stay strong for Ikki but he'd demand Ikki stay just as strong for his sake too.]
We'll take all this. And we won't forget. And when hunt down those marines, we'll use every second of this to make them hate it too.
[Revenge. He can handle that. A lot. That's his peace. It's not peace or order by way others might recognize it, but it was its own existence and he'd make it happen.]
[Action]
What other thing they could be besides aggressive?
Life is aggression. Everything needs to prey on something else to live, to destroy to live, new things are born from the destruction of others. Even flowers suck the ground dry with their roots, taking everything they need, everything they want. And when several flowers need the same thing and stand in the same place? They fight, several of them will die and only the ones whose roots grow faster, larger, will survive by overtaking everything in the ground.
A subtly form of aggression and hunting, but still one. Still destruction.
People revere the phoenix as a sign of rebirth, but they always forget that for its rebirth first it must die. To destroy. Without the destruction, without death, there's no need to rebirth, there's no phoenix.
Phoenixes can't have peace. Not the peace this place wants to. A peace that turns off their flames, that extinguishes their lives.
He should want peace, he knows that. He fights for it after all. But he doesn't want it, because he was born to fight for it. If peace ever really comes to be, eternal and unaltered, if life ever stops being aggression, burning brightly and wildly like a star... What will it be of him?
He will lose meaning. He will lose the sense of his existence. Because he was born to fight and destroy. His Cloth was born to fight and destroy. And no one seemed to understand. Not Athena, nor Shun, nor Shiryuu, no one did. No one realized what the Phoenix Cloth had been waiting for during all those centuries, for whom it had waited. They thought that Ikki's bond with the Cloth was the same as theirs, that the Cloth was just an armor, a help. But it isn't. The Cloth is him, just as much as he is the Cloth. Both are the phoenix. They can exist separately, he can exist without his Cloth and it can become nothing but a decorative object, but he will never stop being the phoenix. Ever since he wore the Cloth for the first time he knew, the reason why he could cast away the Cloth isn't because it's not important or vital, but because what was inside of it is now inside of him.
The phoenix. Burning. Soaring. Raging.
And will stay there, because that's what he is. He may not have a proper bird form as Marco, but he's no less of a phoenix than he is.
But then why is Marco affected by this place in such a way? Maybe because of their differences, as similar as they are the number of key differences is far too great. And while Marco gets intoxicated by the life side of this place, gets attracted to it. All that Ikki wants to do is kill everything.
He really needs to destroy something, it's the only way he can feel alive right now.]
Promise it.
Promise we will hunt them, us both. Without kids.
[Promise that something good will come from being here, from being pushed and forced. From being tempted to destroy himself because deep down, even the purest and holiest thing wants the destruction of the things that don't bow to it, that don't accept it the way they should.
If he has that promise he will have something to look forward to. And he will drag Marco to fulfill that promise the moment he gets a chance.
Revenge. Destruction. Let everything just burn.
Just let him burn.
And he will stay quiet, keep raging inside but quiet. He won't go, or leave or die, no matter how tempting it is, how much this place wants him to. Because Marco is there and he needs him the same way Ikki needs Marco. Ikki understands it.
Marco is being affected by and dragged to the life side of this coin. Ikki is affected and pushed to the death side of it. Ikki needs Marco in order to not just go drown himself, the pressure on his back is the only thing that has kept him from standing up and doing so. And Marco probably needs Ikki as well to not go too crazy with the dirty ducklings and flowers.
He wants nothing more than to just kidnap Marco and take him away, and Thatch and Namur and Natsuno too because he probably isn't taking this place well either. But he can't, he must not. So a promise of what will come will work. He will make it work.]
[Action]
We'll blaze the Spade name so fiercely through this world they'll understand what it means to touch our crew and they'll know better.
Never again.
I promise.
[Action]
[He nods, heavily.
It's really heavy. The pressure this place gives him.
But Marco has promised so he will take it, he will endure it.
He won't kill the ducklings, nor burn the forest, neither drown himself. Because Marco needs him. And even if he didn't need Marco, he would do anything for his brother.]
Go bath more ducklings if you want. I will stay here.
And keep it in.
[He won't give in. He won't join. But he will stay close. And he will rage inside, burn and fight.
Until they are out of the island. Until Marco is fine again.
Until he can smear some marine brains over the walls and literally bath in their blood.
There won't be flames for a quick, even if painful, death. There will be just violence and destruction. And even if there are flames they will be slow, so painfully slow that they will wish he would just smash their heads open.
It's a promise.]
[Action]
[Come night, he'll probably send Ikki back to the ship when he's feel better and when he can face the night head on alone, but for now, really just Ikki there, and knowing he's not the only one who feels it all at once is all he needs. He's been the only phoenix for so long that sometimes he can't tell what is Marco, what is Whitebeard, what is pirate, what is human, and what is bird.]
[And there's something peaceful in the knowing. In an actually goodish way. Less absolute than the peace the forest demands, and more heartening. Soothing.]
[So he'll collect the rage, compress it, and use it to dismember enemies. And holding that isn't fighting, but it's not letting the forest invade him either.]
[Action]
[He can do that. Because he wants it too. Marco's weight on his back makes it a bit easier. Knowing that he's not the only one affected this way.
It's silly, but he still isn't used to it. The knowledge that there's another phoenix around. That there's someone who can understand him. He had come to accept it as being impossible, that no matter how much people tried to, or wanted to, or how much he explained... No one would really understand.
That he was alone. And would always be alone. Any and all interactions with others, the moments he spent with his brothers, were nothing but illusions. Brief daydreams that served for nothing but to fool himself if he allowed himself to believe them.
No matter how much everyone tried. No matter what Athena tried, or how much she sincerely wished for it. The phoenix is both a solitary and lonely creature. Always roaming the world, looking for a place to rest, looking for someone to understand it and being unable to find either because he was unique and his flames only stopped to burn when it died in order to start burning again, brighter and stronger.
He was destruction and death. The peace, the rebirth, those came only after the destruction and death, never before, never along them.
But here Marco exists. Here there's a phoenix and he doesn't have to roam the world alone. He has a place where he can rest in. Someone he doesn't have to be scared about hurting. Someone that understands.
That is a peace and joy he can get behind of. That's all the peace and joy he needs and wants.
He's still burning. He still hates this place. It still pushes and forces him, trying to make him bend. But he is better now, he collects it and keeps it inside, focusing on the true source of peace that stands in this island, even if Marco is as troubled and bothered as he is. He will hold his ground and stand right behind Marco, where the other needs him.]