piratejournal | ♥ 001

[text]

[Flowing, almost archaic script starts to inundate the page.]

Dearest Brother,

I do not know if you will ever receive this letter. All I know is that I have been spirited away to this dastardly, horrid, menacing, troubling, and mysterious place known as Isla Empieza. I am very much afraid – who knows what the people here would do to a young maiden such as myself? Oh, oh, my dearest brother, my virtue is at stake – you must come at once! If I die here, I will come back to haunt you and you will never hear the end of it, so I suggest that you come and fetch me at this very moment! One such man asked me my name, and I threw him off the dock. I am truly helpless, waif-like, and defenseless, and I need your aid!

Please, also let my darling fiance Ranma-sama know that I am longing for him. I will simply not entertain thoughts of any other until I find myself in his arms once more. I know how he grieves, but console him, my dearest sibling. How he must pine for me – it is unthinkable.

Brother, I will put this letter in a bottle and hope that it reaches you. I will perhaps ask a turtle to bear it for me. When you receive this, please come and rescue me!

Love,
The Star of Hope of the Gymnast World
The Black Rose
Your Beloved Sister
Kodachi

[voice]

[Some time later . . .]

I can't rip the page out! I've been trying for hours! It just . . . flies back into the journal . . . !!! Magic exists, but only to taunt me! The fates are against me! I'll never be rescued now!

[Cue shrieks, wails, and sobs. When sorrows come, they come not single spies but in battalions.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[... This is getting annoying, and fast. Especially considering Ragna's extremely short fuse.]

The hell do you expect me to do, run over there and pat you on the head?

Would that be so bad?

Are you outta your goddamn mind? First, for all you know, we might be hundreds of miles apart! And second... who the hell asks something like that from a total stranger?!

[Not only does he have absolutely no interest in playing her nanny, he's also pretty sure that if he did that, with his luck he'd just end up being accused of being a pedophile. ~~Again.~~]

How would you know how far apart we are unless we find out?

A lady looking for comfort is someone who asks for something like that, quite obviously! I'm in distress!

Fine, if you're so cold - be that way!

[If only he could see her lifting her nose up in a haughty sniff. Men these days were so callous!]

You said you're on Empieza. I'm not. Put two and two together, lady.

["Cold" might not be the word he'd use to describe himself, but... he can't argue he doesn't care too much.]

So why are you still wasting your time talking to me if you're not going to give me any comfort? What other ways could you possibly dash a maiden's hopes?

You know, I'm beginning to wonder myself.

Best of luck, take care, and so on and so forth.

You heartless brute!

[SLAM! That's the sound of her closing the journal forcefully and throwing it onto the floor. Yeah, she's dramatic.......... ~~feel free to keep bothering her anyway~~]

[Nah, he'll pass on that. Instead, Ragna just scratches the back of his head, closing his own journal with a sigh.]

Kodachi, was it? Guess that's another one for my Stay Away From book...

[If only he knew.]