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Thinking about getting that haircut after all. I'm open to suggestions, but hey, maybe I'll just shave it all off and start over!

[Unlike Marco, he's not making idle threats. His hair really is getting to be too long and it's starting to get on his nerves. Unfortunately, if he just goes and gets it cut, he's going to have a riot on his hands, so he might as well give everyone fair warning.]

If you haven't seen it, imagine a handsome young man with the biggest, reddest, angriest hedgehog you can think of stuck to his head and that would be this guy.

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[You shush.]

Of course I am. And if you get his help, you can be happy with your hair too, yoi.

I think he's a little past help at the moment.

[And sans pants.]

Drunk wears off.

Is he okay other than drunk?

That'll probably depend on how long it takes him to find his pants.

[LAUGHS.]

Does have an entire chorus line in there with him? I need to know how quickly I ought to go field off angry backstage matrons.

Certainly sounded like it. And here I am making Ace oatmeal and missing out on all the fun.

[When did he become the responsible one? Something's gone seriously wrong with his life.]

Why are you making Ace oatmeal?

I guess he wants one last taste of my cooking before we put him in the home.

[They're going to have to find some sort of old folk's home and drop him off on the doorstep one morning before they leave.]

What home?

[LEA YOU ARE BEING WEIRD TODAY.]

[Even though it's actually Marco's brothers.]

[But you are not a brother yet so you get the blame.]

[Isn't that nice?]

[Gee thanks, Marco.]

The old folk's home! I mean, he's so old and infirm now, after all. I don't know how we're gonna take care of him anymore. What if he starts wearing cardigans and asking us if we want to play checkers all the time? It'll be terrible.

[.....]

[So much quiet.]

[Old people in your world are weird. Also you have clearly not met Whitebeard who, at 72 years of age still collected an entire gorgeous nursing staff, was the strongest man in the world, oh yeah, and declared war on the world government.]

[But this does click in Marco's head eventually.]

Ah, aye. The White hair. I take it he is just living it up now? [The high life of oatmeal.]

Apparently the "ravages of time all caught up to him at once." He gave me his breakfast order and I guess he's gonna share the wisdom of the ages with me or something.

[He can barely wait...]

Ace.

Wisdom.

That has to be amazing.

You must keep a recording handy for the sake of the future of all mankind.

[The future of deadpan trolling hilarity he means.]

I'll leave the journal open. If that doesn't work, I'll memorize it for ya. Maybe I'll even do the voices.

You're my new favorite.

I eagerly await this demonstration.

Aw, you're making me blush. I'll let you know how it turns out, providing I can actually make edible oatmeal.

[He's working on that one. The galley is a mess.]

Ah....

Try not to waste too much food. It's not as bad while we're at land, but at sea that's dangerous, eh?

I know, I know. That's why I'm doing all the creative stuff now so I don't give everyone food poisoning later.

[Oatmeal isn't exactly creative, but it's a step up from sandwiches, which is about all he's been managing.]

Creative?

[Okay... new task order: find a cook.]

[Nooo, that's Lea's galley!]

Hey, I started out strictly sandwiches. It's a learning experience.

You're worrying me, mate.

No one's even gotten sick yet! Totally fine!

I'm not sure that counts as a ringing endorsement, yoi.

Baby steps! Non-toxic, then edible, then decent and maybe I'll hit good before we go home!

I think I'll look for a cook for you lot.

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